


War Of Attrition

by siriusblackfoot



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Marauders - Fandom
Genre: Angst, Benjy Fenwick - Freeform, Drama, F/M, Friendship, M/M, Magical Violence, Marauders, Marauders' Era, Marlene Mckinnon - Freeform, Modern Era, Muggle/Wizard Relations, Order of the Phoenix (Harry Potter), POV Sirius Black, Romance, Sirius Black & Remus Lupin Friendship, Sirius Black Angst, Slow Burn, The Marauders - Freeform, War violence, first wizarding war, jily, wolfstar
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-31
Updated: 2018-12-13
Packaged: 2019-08-13 21:29:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 26,167
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16480088
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/siriusblackfoot/pseuds/siriusblackfoot
Summary: London, 1980. Sirius Black is on the front lines of the First Wizarding War as Voldemort's army threatens everything he holds dear. The Order is struggling to stay afloat. Friends are starting to look like enemies, and enemies are starting to look like friends.What a horribly inconvenient time to fall in love.





	1. The Handy Sip // 1980

**_London_ **

**_New Year’s Eve, 1980_ **  

“Are you sure this is what Muggles wear?” said James Potter uncertainly, twisting his hips so he could properly see his bum in the mirror.  “I mean, are you absolutely sure?” 

Lily nodded enthusiastically and swatted a bit of lint off of the neon orange parachute pants James was wearing. The movement made the fabric swish loudly and Lily could hardly contain her laughter; James looked utterly ridiculous.  

“Would I lie to you?” she asked sweetly. 

“If it resulted in my public embarrassment? Probably,” James chuckled.  “Oi, Moony! Is she fucking with me or is this actually what Muggles are wearing now?” 

Remus sauntered out from the bathroom, his hair wet and half-combed.  Somehow he kept a straight face as he took in James’s outfit—Lily had given him the orange pants, a tight black turtleneck, and several strands of gaudy New Year’s beads to wear around his neck, assuring James that this was the _height_ of Muggle fashion. 

“Of course it is,” Remus played along.  “Don’t you trust your own wife?”  

“Yeah, don’t you trust me?” Lily mimicked, making doe eyes at James, who squinted suspiciously and turned back to the mirror.  Remus and Lily exchanged a look of silent mirth and Remus ducked back into the loo, worried he’d let out a snort of laughter and blow the whole ruse. 

“Fine, I’ll wear it, but I swear to Merlin if I look like a git when we get there—”

“Oh, shut it, you know she’ll still snog you at midnight,” Peter pointed out from his perch on the armrest of the sofa.  Lily gestured toward Peter approvingly and nodded. 

“Yeah, but it remains to be see whether I snog her back,” James replied, but he was smiling and pulled Lily in for a quick kiss.  “That reminds me—where the hell’s Sirius?  Oi, Padfoot, will you quit preening and get your arse out here?” James called down the hallway towards Sirius’s room. 

Sirius emerged a moment later with a huge smirk on his face that only widened once he saw James’s getup.  

“Have I heard wrong, or did you say the thought of snogging reminded you of me?” Sirius chided. 

“Always does, love,” James said with an over-exaggerated wink. “How do I look?” 

“Dashing,” Sirius said without missing a beat.  “Really choice outfit, mate.  Can I borrow those sometime?” he joked, pointing his wand casually towards the garish glow coming off James’s trousers.

“That’s it. I’m changing,” James said, which was met with a chorus of _NO!_ from the whole group.  Lily grabbed James by the arm and started pulling him towards the kitchen. 

“You are not; we’re already behind schedule!” she said.  “Remus, c’mon out here, the Portkey’s set for ten-thirty and we’ve still got drinks to go!” 

Remus joined the group in the living room and James frowned at his friend’s sharp, much more Muggle-looking sweater and corduroy combination.  Peter’s outfits were always questionable, but both Remus and Sirius looked normal.  Before James could say anything, though, Lily flicked her wand towards the liquor cabinet and out flew five small crystal goblets and a decanter of what looked like firewhiskey. 

“To a new year,” Lily said as she poured everyone a goblet.  “And to forgetting everything that’s happened in this last god-awful one.”

Remus laughed.

“I guess if you’ve ever wondered if she regrets marrying you, Prongs, there’s your answer.”

James feigned hurt and clutched a hand to his chest; he knew Lily was just joking around, but her declaration that it had been a shit year wasn’t far off the mark.  James and Lily’s wedding had been one of only a couple much-needed days of lightness in an otherwise dark year, and the Marauders couldn’t wait to see 1979 come to an end.  

The whispers of war that swirled when the Marauders left Hogwarts in 1978 had quickly grown in volume to a growl, and the past year had brought on a dull roar. Voldemort’s steadily growing army made its first major attack almost a year ago to the day when they’d killed the Auror Abacus Smythe’s Muggle parents as they lay sleeping.  Leading up to the murders, Abacus had actually been hunting down the same two Death Eaters who did it, and he would never forgive himself for failing to accomplish his mission sooner.

At the time, such violence had caused outrage across the whole of the Wizarding world, but now, it was common and barely made the front page of the Daily Prophet.  Since then, the Order hadn’t gone a day without hearing of another family gone missing, or more dead Muggles, or another branch of the Ministry that had been placed under the Imperius Curse for a week before anyone caught on. It was an endless cycle.

The Minister of Magic, Millicent Bagnold, was doing all she could to, in her words, “control the Dark offensive,” but from where Sirius and the Marauders stood, it was clear that the only people doing anything to combat Voldemort’s regime were the wizards and witches on the streets.  However, even a good many of them were still too hesitant, too scared, to take direct action. 

Who could blame them, really? Defying Voldemort left one with a target on his back—and the Order of the Phoenix bore the biggest red X of all.  They’d been taking one step forward and two steps for months; no matter how many Death Eaters the Order apprehended or how much intel they were able to gather on missions, it seemed as though Voldemort was always ahead of them, just lying in wait. 

James, Lily, Sirius, Remus and Peter were exhausted from it all, so for New Year’s Eve this year, the Marauders had decided that it would do them all some good to get away from the tumultuous world of magic for a night.  After all, Muggles did know how to properly celebrate the end of the year, and Merlin, did they need to see that end come. 

“Well, cheers!” said Lily, and the group all clinked glasses; however, while the boys all downed their glasses, Lily faked drinking hers and instead used a nonverbal spell and a subtle twist of her wand to empty the glass just as she tipped it against her lips. No one seemed to notice. 

“Anyone want more?” Remus asked as he poured himself another glass.  James and Peter raised their hands and Remus levitated the decanter over to the two of them, but Lily declined and Sirius shook his head and covered his goblet with his hand. 

“I’m trying to make it to midnight this year,” he explained with a sheepish grin.  “But I’ll take some for the road.”  He withdrew a small flask from his jacket pocket and Remus directed the decanter over to him.  As it tipped to fill Sirius’s flask, though, Remus ‘accidentally’ made it spill a bit onto Sirius’s shirt. 

“Watch it, you!” Sirius laughed, and Remus caught his eye and winked.  “Scourgify,” said Sirius as he pointed his wand at the stain, and in an instant it was gone.  He screwed the top back onto the flask and tucked it away inside his jacket this time, where no security guard would notice it when they tried to get into the bar.  

“Two minutes!” Lily announced, looking at her wristwatch.  A wedding gift from Sirius, the watch was a delicate thing with hands that looked as fragile as the spines of a snowflake, but which ticked to the rhythm of time with the utmost precision.  Sirius knew how punctual Lily liked to be, and had the watch custom-made with an enchantment that could sense when its wearer was getting close to running late.  The watch would start to heat up whenever Lily had less than ten minutes to do something.

Peter and James raced to finish the last of their firewhiskey and both were still coughing as the five friends gathered around one of Sirius’s socks that had lost its twin (“It’s clean, I swear!” Sirius insisted.).  Lily had fashioned it into a Portkey that would take them right from Sirius’s flat to a discreet alleyway behind the bar, and since the sock was small, she could just stuff it in her bag until it was time to go home.  After all, Apparating under the influence was strictly illegal, and no one wanted to start 1980 in a bind with the law.

“Everyone got their wands?” asked Sirius.

“You can always have my wand,” James replied suggestively, and Lily elbowed him, which wasn’t hard to do since they were packed in so tightly around the Portkey.

“You flatter me, Jamie,” said Sirius, laying a finger on the toe of the sock and checking with his other hand to make sure his wand was stowed securely in the secret pocket behind his jacket zipper.  Muggle bar or not, it was dangerous to go anywhere without a wand, especially when there was no telling who could be an undercover Death Eater. 

“Thirty,” Lily said, indicating how many seconds they had to go.  Soon after, the Portkey began to glow and shake on the countertop and Sirius felt as though his finger had been glued to it; he couldn’t let go now even if he wanted to.  Then came a sudden, sharp jerk behind his navel, and then they were careening through the air towards the intended alleyway, where their feet slammed hard onto the pavement.

* * *

 “I’ll never get used to that,” Peter grumbled as he got to his feet, having been knocked down from the impact.  James held out a hand and helped Peter to his feet, then looked around for his glasses, which had fallen off. 

“No one saw?” Remus asked a bit nervously as he looked around the alley.

“No one saw,” Lily affirmed. The narrow alley was indeed empty, and Muggles tended to be a bit oblivious to things such a Portkeys and Apparition anyway, which to the Muggle ear sounded much like a car backfiring, or maybe a single firecracker. 

Sirius opened his flask and took a large gulp of firewhiskey as the five of them started making their way towards the Handy Sip.  It was one of Lily’s favorite pubs, and happened to be just a block or so away from the hidden entrance to the Leaky Cauldron.  Until the Death Eater attacks became more frequent, the Order used to meet at the Leaky Cauldron, and the Marauders and Lily would often stop by the Handy Sip after the meeting to mull over what they’d heard.  Now, though, the Order was forced to meet in secret; even the members themselves sometimes weren’t told where a meeting would be held until right before it was to start.

As the five friends rounded the corner onto the bustling London street, they were hit by a wall of cheerful New Year’s sound—Muggles of all ages were dancing along the sidewalks, stumbling in and out of pubs, and even blowing their paper horns at cars that honked right back.  James led the way towards the pub, and his pants provided a rather convenient beacon to follow.

“I still want to know who named this place,” Remus mused as he looked up at the yellow sign for the pub.  “ _Handy_ Sip, what, am I going to get a little extra service if I tip well?” he asked, making a rather crude hand gesture. 

Sirius laughed at Remus’s joke, which seemed to have gone over Peter’s head.  James turned around to make sure they were still following him, then held the door of the pub open for Lily and followed her inside.  Even through the puckered glass windows, they could see James’s pants clear as day. 

“We won’t lose him, that’s for sure,” Remus murmured to Sirius and Peter as they nudged their way through the throngs of people.  By the time they got inside, Sirius had five or six beaded necklaces around his neck and had no idea where he’d gotten them, and both Remus and James had acquired New Year’s hats somewhere along the way. 

For all the fanfare outside, inside the Handy Sip it was rather calm.  Sirius supposed the real crowds would come closer to midnight, but he couldn’t complain. 

James and Lily immediately headed to the jukebox to queue up some songs, while Peter made a stop at the men’s room.  Sirius and Remus saved him a stool at the bar and then sat down themselves just to the right of all the beer taps, where they had unbridled access to drinks and a perfect view of the countdown on the telly. 

“Gin and tonic,” Remus ordered, then nudged Sirius to prompt him to order something as well. 

“Erm…just a beer,” he said.  “What’s that one I liked last time?” Sirius whispered to Remus. 

“St. Austell,” Remus told the bartender, and Sirius nodded. That was the one! A moment later, the bartender placed their drinks in front of them and Remus tossed a 10-pound note onto the counter. 

“So,” said Remus, turning to Sirius after a moment, “Who are you snogging tonight? Not me again, I hope,” he joked.

“This bottle,” Sirius answered, taking a sip to prove his point.  It was a fair question, though.  This time last year, he and Remus had been…not _dating_ , but doing just about everything but.  When the war picked up, James and Lily had gotten married, but Sirius and Remus had “knocked off the hanky-panky,” as James put it, and chose to put their efforts in the war ahead of a relationship.  The transition back to friends without the benefits had gone much smoother than Sirius was sure anyone expected, himself included. 

“That’s no answer,” Remus urged.  “I know who I’m snogging,” he added with the air of someone who’s dying to be asked to elaborate. 

“Do you?” asked Sirius with mild interest, taking the bait.  “Let’s hear it, then.” 

“That bloke over there,” said Remus decisively, nodding towards a young man on the other end of the bar.  He was astonishingly handsome, Sirius had to admit. 

“And does ‘that bloke’ _know_ you’re going to snog him?” Sirius teased. 

“Not yet,” said Remus confidently.  “Don’t worry, I’ll ask him first.”

“More of a courtesy than you did me,” Sirius said with a smirk as he took another sip.  Remus chuckled; it was true.  His and Sirius’s kiss last New Year’s wasn’t so much a kiss as it was Remus drunkenly launching himself into Sirius’s mouth, spilling both their champagne in the process.  Memorable and oddly charming, nonetheless. 

“I’m serious, Sirius,” Remus joked, and Sirius rolled his eyes at the overused pun.  “I’m sure you can find someone in this bar…unless you’d rather kiss Wormtail,” he added, just as Peter sidled up to them at the bar and slid into his stool. 

“What’d I miss?” he asked breathlessly. 

“Padfoot needs somebody to loooove,” Remus half-spoke, half-sang.  “And I’ve nominated you.”

“Merlin, what’d I do to deserve that?” Peter made a face like he’d just sniffed a potion gone wrong. 

“That’s proof, Pads,” Remus laughed as he sipped his gin and tonic. “Not as much of a looker as you were back at Hogwarts!” 

“Yeah, well, Hogwarts was a different time entirely,” Sirius said lightly, but the more somber implication of good times gone by wasn’t lost on Remus and Peter, and the three young men fell into silence.  In the absence of conversation, Sirius noticed that ironically, John Lennon’s “War Is Over” Christmas song was playing in the bar—he’d always loved Lennon, and liked that this song in particular was seasonal, but was also an anthem of peace anyone could listen to year round.

“We probably shouldn’t talk about that stuff here, lads,” Remus then reminded them as Lennon crooned about conflict’s end.  Was there ever an end to war, though? Sirius wondered.

“Yeah, we’ll save the Hogwarts chatter for later, yeah?” Peter said, and he was right; it was dangerous to mention anything about magic in the company of Muggles lest something slip out, but the bar was crowded and everyone was too wrapped up in their own already failed resolutions to listen in. 

“No one’s going to hear,” Sirius assured Peter, but he was soon proven wrong. 

“What’s Hogwarts? Some new strain I haven’t heard of?” 

The voice came from Sirius’s left; he hadn’t even noticed that the stool there was no longer vacant until he heard a voice pipe up near his shoulder.  He, Remus, and Peter all turned to face the speaker.

“Yeah, it gives you a really nice high,” Sirius replied smoothly.  “You could almost say it’s…magical,” he finished with a smirk back at Remus, who sighed, and Peter, who choked on his drink. 

“I’ll have to try it out sometime,” came the reply.  The young woman speaking was without a doubt one of the loveliest looking girls Sirius had ever seen in his life.  She had long, dark brown hair that held the slight wave of collapsing Farrah Fawcett-style curls that fell to just below her shoulders.  Her blue eyes sparkled with the excitement of meeting someone new and she held out her hand to shake Sirius’s. 

“I’m Devin,” she introduced herself, then she swatted the man next to her.  “This gorgeous one right here is Etienne.”

Etienne rolled his eyes with a smile as he held out his hand; clearly it wasn’t the first time Devin had introduced him this way.  Sirius shook with Etienne as well—Remus, on the other hand, turned visibly pink even in the dim bar light, and a second later Sirius realized why with a start.  Etienne was the same bloke he’d pointed out earlier as being the one he wanted to snog!

“I’m Sirius,” Sirius said, shaking Etienne’s hand.  He _was_ extremely handsome, even more so now that he was close and not on the other side of the bar.  Sirius was keeping his cool on the outside, but inwardly shaking; where had these two gorgeous people fucking _come_ from? 

“You are serious? About what?” asked Etienne; he had a thick French accent and even though Sirius had his back to Remus, he could practically feel Remus getting more and more flustered with each passing second. 

“Sorry, my _name’s_ Sirius,” he clarified.  “I know, it’s a weird one, but if you knew my parents…anyway, this is Peter, and the one blushing back there is Remus,” Sirius teased, and Remus promptly excused himself, nearly knocking his barstool over in the process.  

“Is he alright?” Devin asked, looking after Remus with concern.  

“Oh, he’s fine,” Sirius replied nonchalantly.  Then, on second thought, he added, “Pete, maybe go check on him, yeah?” Peter nodded, taking the hint, and followed Remus into the crowd. 

Devin watched Peter go, then turned her attention back to Sirius. “So, besides blushing friends and weak beer,” she said, nodding at Sirius’s bottle, “what brings you out tonight?” 

“The end of an era,” said Sirius melodramatically, gesturing around at all the silver and gold streamers dangling from the ceiling.  “Just ringing in the new year with some of my oldest friends, as one does.  And this beer’s excellent, I’ll have you know.” 

Devin made a face like she didn’t believe Sirius, but she refrained from comment and then gestured to Etienne and herself.  “We’re here with our organization.  We all needed a bit of a break from…what did the Sun call it, Etti?” 

“Egregious acts of protest,” Etienne said after a moment of thought.

“Right,” said Devin fondly. 

“What org?” asked Sirius, his interest piqued. Egregious acts of protest sounded right up his alley, and it was an interesting coincidence that he, too, was at the bar with members of his own organization, although he couldn’t tell Devin anything about the Order. 

“The CND,” Devin replied.  “And I say we’re here with the organization, but it’s really just a fraction of us.  We’re close to 9,000 strong now!” 

For the sake of not looking like an idiot, Sirius nodded, but he had no clue what in Merlin’s name Devin was on about _.  What the hell did CND stand for?_  

“I don’t think I’m familiar,” Sirius said after a moment.  Devin and Etienne looked at each other, then back at Sirius, and he got the feeling he’d said something he shouldn’t’ve. 

“Campaign for Nuclear Disarmament,” Etienne explained.  

“Right,” said Sirius, faking recognition, “right, I’ve heard a bit about that, yeah.” 

Devin raised an eyebrow; she saw right through Sirius’s fib. She paused in thought for a moment, then turned to Etienne.  

“Etti, pourrais-tu aller nous chercher à boire?” she addressed him in French. 

“Qu’est que tu aimerais?” He replied, asking Devin what kind of drink she’d like.  She turned to Sirius with a thoughtful look. 

“Tequila?” she asked him, and Sirius nodded. He hadn’t understood the question, but tequila was always the answer. 

“Sounds good to me!” 

“Three tequila shots,” Etienne confirmed, then smiled a temporary goodbye before slinking off to try and find an open spot at the bar.  Devin watched him go with a warm smile. 

“He and I used to fuck, you know,” she said suddenly as she turned on her stool, and it took a lot of effort on Sirius’s part not to spit out the sip of beer he was in the middle of taking.  “I always tell people that so they know I have high standards,” she continued as casually as if she were talking about the weather.  “I mean, look at him!” 

“Fit, sure,” Sirius agreed, quite bemused.  After a moment, though, he got his wits about him and figured two could play at this game.  “My friend Remus and I, we used to fuck,” he said with a shrug. 

“The blushing one?” Devin said, surprised but not bothered in the slightest.  “Oh, he’s adorable!”

Sirius nodded with a laugh; he decided he liked Devin.  At the very least, he was intrigued, and flagged down the bartender for another beer. 

“Make it two,” Devin chirped.  “Some bloke told me it’s ‘amazing.’” 

“He sounds like a prat,” Sirius played along, chuckling at her sass.  “So. I didn’t catch your last name.” 

“May,” she answered. “Yours?” 

“Black. Let me guess, you were born in May?” Sirius said jokingly. He knew it was a corny joke, and by the look on Devin’s face, one she was no stranger to hearing. “Ah…not born in May, but definitely tired of that pun,” Sirius said sheepishly, and Devin nodded. 

“So, tell me about this CND,” Sirius said to save the conversation.  “What sort of ‘egregious protest’ do you get up to?”

Devin laughed, and it was a sound Sirius was sure he could hear for the rest of his life and be completely and utterly satisfied. 

“You’re not from around here, are you?” 

“Er, I _am_ from London, actually,” Sirius said. 

“Could have fooled me; the CND’s been raising hell around here.  I wonder how you haven’t heard of us?  Anyways, we’re peaceful, until we’re not.  Marches, rallies, things like that…we’re just trying to spread our cause and increase membership.  Back when were were founded it was all peace, all the time…although we _have_ been known to heckle a few of the missile transports now and again.”

“Missiles?” Sirius blurted out.  “ _That’s_ what you’re against?”

“Mhm,” Devin said, clearly unfazed as she paid the bartender and started drinking.  “Among other things.  We want a non-nuclear Britain, and eventually worldwide abolition of weapons of mass destruction.”

“Oh! Like the atomic bomb,” said Sirius; his mind had suddenly clicked as he recalled one of the few Muggle Studies lessons that had really enraptured the whole class in fifth year, when they’d briefly talked about the second Muggle world war and the bombs that the United States used to end it.

“Exactly. The Cold War’s been going on what, 30 years now? It’s only a matter of time before one of the nuclear countries snaps, and then we’re all done for. My money’s on America. If they’ve done it before, they’ll do it again, no matter what their president says,” she said testily. 

Sirius nodded slowly; it was an interesting topic, and he was eager to hear more about it. Plus, a woman fighting for a cause was a huge turn-on.  Just as he was about to ask Devin why she joined the CND, though, the song playing on the jukebox changed abruptly and a tinny, synthesized beat began to fill the bar. 

“Speak of the bloody devil,” Devin laughed.  “D’you know this song?” She pointed abstractly into the air.  “God damn _Enola Gay_ ,” she said with a shake of the head. “That calls for another drink.”

As if on cue, Etienne reappeared holding three shots of tequila precariously in his hands.  He passed them out to Sirius and Devin.

“Cheers,” Etienne said, and the trio down their shots together.  As he tried to hide how the liquor made him gag, Sirius focused on the song’s lyrics. He had definitely heard it before, but until now he’d always thought it was some kind of love song.  Now that he had some context to OMD’s lyrics, though, it took on a whole new meaning. _Enola gay, is mother proud of little boy today…this kiss you give, it's never ever gonna fade away…_

"Do you really think that's what we're headed for?” Sirius asked over the music. “That kind of war?" 

Devin and Etienne both nodded vigorously. 

"If the government keeps at it the way they are it's only a matter of time," said Devin.

Sirius furrowed his brow as he pondered this. The Muggle Studies lesson had covered what Muggles called the Atomic Age—the fear that bombs that could level entire cities would be dropped any minutes, homes built with underground shelters, emergency drills—he had no idea it was still an issue, and that scared him.  Even the worst curses couldn’t kill more than a couple people at once, but a nuclear bomb—if he remembered the lesson correctly—had the power to kill hundreds of thousands of civilians in an instant.

“Hey! Ground control to Major Tom,” Devin said teasingly, and Sirius looked up to her standing before him, her hand outstretched. 

“I said let’s dance,” she said with a smile, and Sirius shook thoughts of nuclear war from his mind.  He grinned and let Devin lead him out onto the dance floor where they found James, Lily, Peter, and Remus, who had found another, less French but still very attractive man to dance with.  Etienne had headed off to rejoin the rest of the CND members that he and Devin had come with, leaving the latter with Sirius. 

They danced long enough for Sirius to lose track of how long they’d danced, until finally the music stopped and all the bar-goers looked up and simultaneously noticed that the New Year’s countdown was only five minutes away from midnight.  The Handy Sip staff was making the rounds with plastic glasses filled with champagne and Sirius plucked two off of a passing tray. 

As the crowed counted down the last ten seconds of 1979 and Auld Lang Syne started to resonate throughout the Handy Sip, Sirius looked around saw that nearly everyone was paired off—some couples were as old as time, others like James and Lily looked freshly but truly in love, and still others were clearly just enamored for the night. 

“THREE…TWO…ONE…HAPPY NEW YEAR!!” The cheering of the crowd damn near blew the walls off the pub, and a rain of confetti poured from various crackers and glitter guns as 1980 officially began.  Sirius realized he’d subconsciously placed one hand on the small of Devin’s back, and they turned to look at each other, beaming. 

“Happy New Year, then,” she said, and Sirius repeated the words, then, figuring it was only right, he leaned in for a kiss.  At the last second, Devin turned her head to one side and Sirius’s lips met her cheek instead. He wasn’t all that surprised; if anything, her coyness made her even more attractive and Sirius settled for wrapping an arm around Devin instead as she held out her hand and tried to catch pieces of shiny foil confetti. 

“Cheers,” she said finally, and she and Sirius clinked champagne glasses and looked around at the crowd; James and Lily were still kissing, but most couples had moved on to finishing out Auld Lang Syne with a slow dance.  Sirius and Devin moved off to the side and leaned against the wall perpendicular to the bar to finish off their glasses of bubbly. 

“I love a good champagne, but that’s not nearly strong enough,” Devin said, examining her empty glass.

“Hang on,” said Sirius with a sudden air of mischief.  “I’ve got something I think you’ll like. Can’t tell anyone where you got it, though, alright?” 

Devin nodded. She doubted there was an alcohol she hadn’t heard of, but was nevertheless interested.  Sirius reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out the small flask he’d filled with firewhiskey earlier.  Sure, he couldn’t tell Devin it was a _magical_ drink, but there was neither law nor side effects that prevented Muggles from trying the stuff—if they were offered it, of course. 

“Be careful, it’s got a bite to it,” Sirius said warningly as Devin unscrewed the top of the flask and sniffed.  She recoiled a bit. 

“This smells like Fireball,” she commented, then took a swig.  “It _is_ Fireball.” 

“Fire _whiskey_ ,” Sirius corrected. “Intense, isn’t it?”

Devin stared at Sirius with a look that clearly asked if he was pulling her leg.  “I’ve had this before,” she said, and Sirius furrowed his brow.  How was that possible? 

“No you haven’t!” 

“Yes, I have! Look—hey!” she called to the bartender, holding up two fingers. “Fireball.”  

A moment later, the bartender brought over two shot glasses filled to the rim with liquor that Sirius had to admit, looked exactly like firewhiskey.  Devin raised hers in cheers and Sirius copied her, then they both took their shots.  Devin couldn’t help but smirk victoriously at Sirius’s look of bewilderment—it _was_ the same as firewhiskey! 

“I don’t know where you buy your stock, Black, but you’d better double check and make sure they aren’t misprinting labels,” she teased, while Sirius took another sip from his flask to compare tastes. Yep. Just the same. _Shit, maybe Muggles weren’t completely clueless after all._

“Alright, you win,” Sirius admitted. “Last time I ever try to impress you, I guess,” he added loftily, with a flirtatious smirk. 

“Oh, is that what you were trying to do?” Asked Devin sarcastically, and Sirius rolled his eyes with a smile. “Try absinthe next time if you really want to sweep a woman off her feet,” she said. 

“Noted,” Sirius laughed. 

"You're really fucking strange, Sirius Black," Devin said a moment later.  She shook her head in bewilderment as she surveyed the man sitting next to her, stirring the melting ice in her glass with her straw. "Want to take me home?" 

 _Merlin’s balls._ Just when he thought she couldn't surprise him any more in one night. 

"Yeah, I'd like that," said Sirius with a grin. He took one last swig from the flask, draining it, and took Devin's jacket from the coat hook under the bar. He held it open for her and she slid it on, and when she freed her hair from where it'd been trapped in the garment, Sirius caught a whiff of some kind of rosy shampoo. 

"Well don't stand there all night!" Devin laughed, and Sirius jumped into action.  They wove through the crowd until finally, Sirius spotted Lily’s hair and James’s equally vibrant trousers.

James’s glasses were askew, his face was flushed, and he had a couple of prominent lipstick marks on his face. Sirius couldn’t help but grin as he pulled his rather drunk best mate into a hug. 

“Padfoot!” James shouted over the music, then grabbed Sirius’s face and kissed him full on the mouth while Lily burst into laughter behind him.  “Happy bloody New Year,” James slurred, “I fucking love you, mate.” 

“Darling, not in public!” Sirius gasped dramatically, then hugged Lily as well, who he noticed seemed oddly sober.  “This is Devin,” Sirius told her.  “She and I are, uh, going to call it a night,” he said, trying and failing to be subtle. 

Lily said a quick hello to Devin, then turned back to Sirius.  “What about the Portk—I mean, the cab?” she corrected quickly. “I think we’re going soon.”

“We’ll get our own,” said Sirius with a wink. “You lot have a good rest of the night, alright? Get 1980 off to a good start, eh? We need it,” he added softly, so only Lily and James could hear. 

“You’ve got yourself a fan club, haven’t you?” Devin teased once Sirius had said his goodbyes. 

“Who, James?” Sirius laughed.  “Yeah. He’s mine and I’m his.” 

“His what?”

“Best mate,” Sirius said with a smile he just couldn’t help. “Brother.  Right-hand man.” Sirius turned and began walking backwards down the sidewalk while Devin followed, looking if possible even prettier in the glow of the street lamps. The curb was littered with confetti and tacky New Years' knick knacks, as though everyone had forgotten the holiday as soon as the clock struck midnight. Sirius thought it seemed as though the throngs of people had simply disappeared, or had he and Devin really been dancing so long they just didn't notice the crowd thinning? 

"So, where's home for you?" Devin asked, and they fell into step together. Sirius stopped in his tracks.  _Mother fucker._

He couldn't take Devin home. No way in _hell_ could he take Devin home.  His flat was loaded with magical objects—old textbooks, Gryffindor memorabilia, moving posters, potted plants of varying levels of legality...not to mention he was fairly certain he'd charmed the dishes to do themselves, and he'd most definitely left his broomstick on the sofa. 

"Erm, actually, I was thinking we could go to yours?" Sirius asked sheepishly, scratching the back of his head. "It's just, mine's a right mess, and I didn't expect--" 

"Nope." 

"Nope?"

Devin shook her head. "Sorry, it's nothing personal. I just don't bring men home; I always go home with men."

"Why?" 

Devin looked as though this was the most obvious question in the world, one she never thought she'd actually have to answer for someone.

"Because then I can decide when things are over! Blokes never know when to leave," she said matter-of-factly.

Sirius mumbled something about how _he_ would know when to leave, but Devin just smiled sympathetically and patted his arm. 

"Sorry, mate. Just how messy is your place? I'm a slob myself, so I wouldn't judge."

"Oh it's bad," Sirius said emphatically. _Yep, enchanted kitchenware and Venomous Tentacula bad._

“That’s a shame,” said Devin, and she did look genuinely disappointed.  That is, until her eyes lit up and she pulled a small notepad and pen from her bag.  She held up a ‘wait’ finger to Sirius as she scrawled something on the paper and tore it from the pad.  

“Here’s where I work,” she explained, and Sirius looked down at the address; it wasn’t too far from his flat. “I’m there whenever I’m not meeting with the CND, and I’m with the CND whenever ‘m not there, but…stop by sometime?  You can tell me all about that ‘Hogwarts’ pot of yours,” she said with a twinkling smile. 

Sirius took the paper and nodded.  Devin started to walk away towards where several cabs were already waiting, and on second thought came back to Sirius, stood on her tiptoes, and kissed him on the cheek.  A moment later, she had one foot in the back of the cab, and Sirius could still feel her lips lingering on his skin as he turned to reenter the bar. 

"Hey!” Devin suddenly called out. “November!” 

Sirius turned; he hadn't quite caught what she’d said. "What?" 

"I was born in November," Devin called again, and Sirius laughed. 

"So was I," he replied. 

"Then it was meant to be," Devin said playfully, then blew a kiss and ducked and disappeared in the backseat of the taxi. 

Sirius watched as the cab pulled away from the curb, then looked down at the slip of paper on which Devin had written her name and the name of what Sirius took to be a hair salon.  He shook his head in amusement and stuck the note into his jacket…right next to his wand. 

A moment later, James, Lily, Remus and Peter came bursting out from the Handy Sip, all four of them pulling on their jackets and discarding their various festive baubles. 

“Good, you haven’t left,” James said urgently, then realized Devin was nowhere to be seen and changed his tune. “I mean, sorry your bird’s flown the coop, that’s really unfortunate, mate, but—”

“Emergency Order meeting,” Remus cut in, tapping his sleeve where he’d hidden his wand.  Sirius’s heart seized as he felt his wand vibrate in his jacket as well. It was a rather genius method Dumbledore created of letting Order members know when to meet aside from scheduled gatherings. 

“Did something happen?” He asked, afraid to hear the answer.

“We’re not sure,” said Lily, “But we’d better go.” 

Sirius nodded again and the five of them headed back towards the alley where the Portkey had landed.  Lily pulled a small vial out of her purse and passed it around the circle; it was a Sobriety Solution she’d brewed for the boys earlier that day, and as soon as Sirius took a sip he felt as though he hadn’t had a single drink.  Talk about a literal buzzkill. 

“C’mon, it’s better if we just Apparate,” said Lily, and a second later, she’d disappeared with a pop that blended in perfectly with the city noise as if it were just another New Year’s cracker.  The rest of the group followed until only Sirius and James were left in the alley.

“She didn’t ‘fly the coop,’ for the record,” Sirius informed James.  “Rain check.” 

“Then she’ll still be around tomorrow, yeah? Chin up, mate,” James said, lightly punching Sirius in the shoulder.  “Tonight we’ve got to focus on Order business.”

Sirius nodded, and he and James did their quick secret handshake before Apparating to the Order’s meeting place for what was likely bad news, or worse.

 _War is over_ , _my ass_ , Sirius thought.

* * *

  **And so it begins!! Again, please comment if you liked this (or didn't!) and stay tuned for CHAPTER TWO: ONCE DEFIED, coming November 7!**

**Also, you can follow me on tumblr if oyu want (@siriusblackfoot there as well), where I'll be answering questions about this fic and sharing it there too! Thank you all so much for you support!!**

**-Cait**


	2. Once Defied

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I said this chapter was coming next week, but I decided that it makes more sense and helps the story get rolling if you guys read it sooner rather than later, so here you go!

**_The Order of the Phoenix Headquarters_ **

**_January 8, 1980_ **

**_..._ **

_TINWORTH STILL REELING AFTER RAIDS KILL 3_  

Sirius shook his head at the glaring headline and folded the Daily Prophet in half so he couldn’t see the photos of wizards running from their homes, spells flying over their heads.  No matter how many moving photographs he’d seen, ones like these always shook him to his core, and that unease was compounded by the fact that he hadn’t just seen these particular pictures—he’d been there.  He could still hear the screams of innocent witches and wizards as they were cursed in their tracks by attackers they could hardly pinpoint, much less identify.  He could smell the singed wood where curses miraculously missed their targets, but ripped holes in house walls instead.

Dumbledore had called the emergency Order meeting on New Year’s Eve too late. 

By the time he had briefed the members who’d shown up on the situation, it had worsened.  In their haste to get prepared and Apparate to the scene, Sirius had gathered that Death Eaters had closed in on the wizarding village of Tinworth, which was highly populated with halfblood families.  As the Prophet reported the next morning, any witch or wizard the Death Eaters came across in their raid was given a chance to swear loyalty to Voldemort—swear it, or be killed.  That was Voldemort’s idea of mercy. 

The melee had ended before Sirius and the others, along with a handful of other Order members, even showed up. On one hand, that meant no casualties for the Order, but on the other…well, Voldemort had gained eleven new followers by coercion and those who had stood their ground, stood no longer.  Many had managed to Apparate and some had even fought back and lived, but the Daily Prophet unfortunately displayed an accurate headline: three wizards, and humble, law-abiding ones too, had been killed. 

That was a week ago. A week since the only problem Sirius had to face was that he couldn’t take Devin home from the bar.  In the days that followed, he’d been too busy with the fallout from the Tinworth attack to see her again, or even drop in at her work, though he’d passed by it a few times.  Now, he doubted she thought of him as anything more than the git who never contacted her again.  _If she’s even still thinking about you at all_ , he thought. 

As rotten as he felt about ignoring her, though, people in the wizarding community were quite literally dying, and the Order needed a real plan of action that went beyond just reacting too little and too late every time Voldemort’s army struck.   

However, that proved easier said than done as yet another biweekly Order meeting devolved into a debate. 

“If we keep on sitting on our arses doing nothing, we’re flobberworms in a barrel!” Lily was arguing.  There was a rumble of assent from several others in the Order, but Dumbledore shook his head. 

“We must wait to take action until it is absolutely necessary,” he said coolly, and despite the chatter in the room, somehow his voice was perfectly audible.  “Making any kind of offensive movement now would be foolish.” 

“It _is_ absolutely necessary!” Lily rebutted.  She opened her mouth like she wanted to argue more, but Dumbledore gave her a look and she sat back down in her chair, jaw clenched and arms folded across her chest.  James rubbed circles on her back comfortingly. 

“I think it’s safer to lie low,” Peter piped up, nodding towards Dumbledore.  “We can still get intel, but we don’t have the numbers we need to fight back.  Vol—I mean, You-Know-Who’s got hundreds, we’ve got what, forty?” he said after doing a quick head count.  Peter then shrunk back into his seat, feeling embarrassed that he’d still been unable to speak Voldemort’s name, and he regretted speaking at all. 

However, Dumbledore nodded.  “Precisely my point. Loss of life, and there _would_ be loss of life, would be a much bigger blow to us than to Voldemort,” he said, looking around those seated at the table.  The seats filled with the young far outnumbered those filled with the old. “I’m sure you can all understand—would you like to say something, Sirius?” 

Sirius had made a noise of disapproval, and all heads swiveled towards him.  Unashamed at being called out, though, Sirius nodded and leaned forward in his chair. 

“Respectfully, sir, I’m with Evans,” Sirius said, still using her school nickname.  It was a habit neither he nor James could shake.  He caught Lily’s eye, smiled grimly, then tossed the copy of the Prophet down into the center of the table.  It landed face up, so that everyone could see the front page and the pictures of people they weren’t able to help.  “We could have stopped that. I know we could have, if we’d just known sooner.” 

“But we didn’t,” said Alice Longbottom, speaking for the first time in the meeting.  “I agree with you, Sirius, but we were caught just as off guard as Tinworth itself was.  We need to stay quiet and learn more about who we’re fighting before we run into battle!” 

“Yeah, we can’t just guess where they’ll be next,” her husband Frank added.  “Mind you, it’d be bloody convenient if we could, but at the moment…” he trailed off.  “If we fight based just on hunches, we’ll be off the mark more than on!” 

“Speak for yourself,” Sirius said.  If there was one thing in this world he trusted, it was a good old fashioned gut feeling.  When Sirius had one of those, no amount of logic or contradictory evidence could shake it. 

The Order was split down the middle on whether to act passively or aggressively.  Sirius was happy to hear both Lily and Remus’s voices in the chatter, both arguing for more direct action; Marlene and Benjy seemed adamant as well. 

“Silence,” said Dumbledore loudly, “I will take all your concerns into account between now and the next meeting,” he said as if that settled the matter. “Now. Let’s go over where we _do_ have feet on the ground.  Mr. Potter?” 

James coughed and sat up straight, pushing his glasses up his nose.  Ever the perfectionist, he’d been assigned the task of keeping a log of where each Order member was at all times and what they were doing on their mission, and Dumbledore wanted an update. 

“Dorcas Meadowes and Mary Macdonald have an assignment in Leeds, they’re recruiting,” he read off a scroll of parchment on which he kept track of everyone’s missions.  It was charmed in a manner reminiscent of the Marauder’s Map, so that only people who knew a certain password could read it, lest it fall into the wrong hands.  “Marls and Benjy were in the heart of the city, obviously you two are back now, and we’ve got one more Death Eater in Azkaban, good on you!” James said, and there was a smattering of applause in the room; Marlene and Benjy had just happened upon one of the more known Death Eaters, Walden Macnair, when they were stocking up on some Polyjuice Potion ingredients in Knockturn Alley.   

James cleared his throat and continued.  

“Hagrid’s still meeting with Newt Scamander, he should have that list by Thursday of known creatures Voldemort’s trying to convince to join him.  And Fabian Prewett’s with Kingsley, due back in London tomorrow morning,” he finished. 

“Yes, I got their owl last night.  Thanks to their findings, we can rule out Crook’s Manor in Little Hangleton as a Death Eater safehouse,” Dumbledore said, and the folks around the table breathed a collective sigh of relief.  Molly Weasley and Gideon Prewett looked especially relieved by the news of their brother’s successful mission; Molly had been squeezing Gideon’s hand so tightly his knuckles were turning white on the table. 

“Oh, and Sirius and I leave for Spinner’s End tomorrow,” James added with a nod towards Sirius. “Ready, Pads?”

Sirius nodded.  He was eager to have a mission again after weeks of lying about; he and James had been assigned their own recon operation in Spinner’s End, where there had been whispers of Death Eater activity but no confirmation yet. 

“Then you two had better get a good night’s rest,” said Dumbledore, clapping his hands together once to indicate the meeting’s end.  “Unless anyone else has anything of immediate importance…no?  Well then, I, for one, must get back to Hogwarts in time for a nightcap.” 

With the deafening scrape of wood on wood, the present members of the Order pushed back their chairs and rose; the entire mood in the room always seemed to lift with the end of the meeting, as if everyone had done their thinking of doom and gloom and could now push it to the back burner until the next meeting.  _Or the next attack,_ Sirius thought dubiously. 

“Padfoot,” Sirius heard James say behind him. He turned to see James standing a few meters away.  James cocked his head towards Dumbledore, who beckoned them both closer as the rest of the crowd filtered out.

“This mission is reconnaissance and reconnaissance only,” Dumbledore said firmly.  “Good fighters though I know you both are, two young wizards do not stand a chance against that many or potentially even more Death Eaters, do you understand?  Even if you run into them, you are to observe only.  Do not fight unless you yourselves are attacked first.” 

James’s eyes flitted towards Sirius’s for a moment, and then they both nodded. 

“What kind of intel are you hoping for, sir?” James asked.  

“Anything you can gather.  Alastor did a sweep last week and saw no red flags, but you must keep out of sight.  This might be an ideal time to wear that cloak of yours, James, unless it’s lost its novelty after all the use I’m sure it got at Hogwarts,” Dumbledore said knowingly. 

James and Sirius grinned at that; it would be just like old times! 

“Understood,” said James.  “We’ll be careful.” 

Dumbledore nodded, dismissing James and Sirius, who joined Lily where she was waiting in the narrow corridor outside the meeting room.  She had her arms folded across her chest and looked at James with fire in her eyes.  He knew exactly what she was about to say and opened his mouth to cut in, but Lily beat him to it. 

“I’m coming with you,” she said determinedly.  

James loved to have Lily by his side during missions, but this time, it was different.  She couldn’t, and what’s more she _shouldn’t_ , and she knew exactly why. 

“Lily,” James began, but his wife cut him off again, looking amused at the notion that he would even think about telling her to stay at home.  

“Spinner’s End, right? That’s where Severus used to live.  I’ve been there, I know it there.  If you’re doing recon, you’ll do it a hell of a lot faster if you’ve got me with you.” 

“I know,” James said, then lowered his voice.  He led Lily a few steps further down the corridor and leaned against the wall, effectively blocking Sirius out of the conversation before continuing.  “But you shouldn’t,” he whispered, glancing subtly down at Lily’s stomach.  It wouldn’t stay flat for much longer, which was a scary enough thought already. 

Sirius couldn’t hear a word they were saying.  He furrowed his brow; it was unlike James to keep anything from him, especially if it was Order-related.  From where he stood, all he could gather was that Lily was insisting _yes_ , and James was insisting _no_.  

“So I’m just supposed to wait at home and hope you don’t get killed, or worse?  I’m not even showing,” Lily said under her breath.  “I can do this. You know I can. I’m going with you.” 

James’s faced bore a pained expression as he weighed the options.  He knew Lily was smart, quick, and practiced in dueling—she could certainly hold her own in the field, and was in many ways an even better fighter than he was.  But on the other, he thought as he lay a hand lightly on her stomach, it simply wasn’t worth the risk.  She was only a few months along—no one even knew but the two of them—and if anything happened to her or their unborn child, James knew he would never forgive himself. 

“I’m sorry, sweetheart,” he said softly, then kissed her forehead. As upset as Lily was, she could see the genuine concern in James’s eyes.  “How’s this,” James continued, opening the conversation up to Sirius again, “Lils, since you do know the area better than any of us, we’ll all sit down tonight and you tell us what we need to know. We can make sure Dumbledore knows you helped.” 

“Fine,” Lily said testily.  “But you’re being stupid."

“That’s nothing new,” said Sirius in an attempt to ease the tension, the reason for which he was still oblivious to. 

Lily raised her eyebrows, but let out a short laugh.  “Don’t I know it.”

* * *

 

Padfoot and Prongs awoke with the sun the next morning; A light blanket of snow had fallen in the night and London looked as if a giant had taken a bag of confectioner’s sugar and had himself a field day.  Had anyone with a keen eye been strolling the streets at sunrise, they might have noticed a set of footprints appearing in the snow; their owner, nowhere to be seen.

James Potter felt completely comfortable in exactly three situations—one, when he was riding a broomstick, and feeling every miniscule vibration of the wood in his fingertips, and the slight creak of the bristles on the end.  The second was when he was with loved ones; as welcoming as his and Lily’s house was, it was the people who filled it that made it home.  The third situation was when he was wearing his dad’s old cloak.  He loved that he could see the entire world, and that world would be none the wiser, completely oblivious to the mischievous voyeur in its midst. 

When James reached Sirius’s flat, he didn’t bother knocking; it wouldn’t do any good.  Everyone in the Order had been trained in protective enchantments, and instructed to guard their homes with spells of their choosing.  Sirius was partial to jinxes, and the last thing James needed on the morning of an Order mission was to wind up with bulging purple pustules all over his face.  Try explaining _that_ at St. Mungo’s.  _Although, it might be shocking enough to give a Death Eater pause,_ he thought. 

Instead, James pulled a small shard of glass from the pocket of his robes and held it in front of his face; he could see Sirius in it, tying his shoes while a pot of tea whistled on the stove.  Sirius caught a glimpse of movement in his own mirror and looked down, pulling a grotesque face at James. James chuckled; it was the same kind of face Sirius always made back when the two of them used the mirrors to communicate when they’d been given separate detentions.  James watched as Sirius grabbed his wand, then paused as he picked something up from his countertop.  It was a small slip of paper—James couldn’t tell what was written on it—which Sirius considered for a moment, then crumpled up and tossed into the garbage bin. 

A moment later, Sirius Apparated onto the walkway outside his flat. Feeling devilish, James snuck up behind Sirius and jabbed him in the ribs; Sirius yelped and whirled around, whipping the cloak off James in the process. 

“Merlin’s fucking pants,” Sirius swore as he realized it was just James.  “Give a bloke a heart attack, really nice of you,” he said sarcastically as his heart rate started to slow down back to normal. 

“We’re on a mission, I’ve got to keep you on your toes! And I’d love to see Merlin’s fucking pants,” James replied cheerfully, “I bet they’re quite raunchy. Probably assless chaps.”  Just his head was bobbing around Sirius’s front steps. 

“Fuck off, Prongs,” said Sirius with a playful shove at his best mate, but he was chuckling.  James finally threw the cloak over Sirius as well; it didn’t cover them as well as it used to, but if Sirius stooped down and James watched his footing, they could manage.  “My, my, what will Lily think?” Sirius joked, taking in his and James’s close proximity. 

“Only that she knew this day would come,” said James cheekily.  “C’mon.”  

The pair Apparated just outside a wrought-iron gate that marked the northern entrance to the village known as Spinner’s End.  It was less of a community and more like a drab collection of homes, all of which looked like the next, and all of which gave off an air of the unknown.  Wands at the ready underneath the cloak, James and Sirius sidestepped the gate and began walking down the cobblestone street, filled with the excitement of fighting for a cause. 

Hours later, though, their joy was waning.  They’d canvassed the entire village and found no signs of Dark goings-on—everything in Spinner’s End was eerie, from the one-legged crow they saw to a bunch of children with dirty hair, playing catch with an equally dirty ball, but eerie didn’t always mean evil.  Dreary though Spinner’s End was, it seemed to be just that.  Now, they’d holed up in the second floor of an inn run by a hag, watching the streets from above for any suspicious activity. 

“Evans said Snivellus lived around here, didn’t she?” Sirius said snarkily after another half hour of nothing. He jerked his head towards one of the dingier-looking buildings.  “I reckon he’s still here somewhere, can’t have had anywhere better to go after Hogwarts.  How about a little ding-dong-ditch?” 

“It’s a mission, Pads,” James reminded Sirius.  “You were the one who said you wanted to be in the field more.” 

“Yeah, kicking Death Eater’s arses and actually fighting, not sitting in a shack watching the bloody _snow_ melt.” 

“Whatever happened with that girl from New Year’s?” James asked to change the subject and take Sirius’s mind off of his boredom.

Sirius shrugged.  “Nothing.”

“Come off it,” James laughed.  “She was one of the most fit girls I’ve ever seen—she’s no Lily, of course, but you’re telling me you’re alright with just letting her walk off?” 

“It was just flirting on New Year’s Eve, Prongs, everyone flirts on New Year’s Eve.  Nothing special,” Sirius said, but if he were being honest with himself, that couldn’t be further from the truth.  He hardly knew Devin, but she’d managed to have him hooked in a way no witch or wizard had before. 

“Didn’t seem that way when you were looking like a lost pup after she got in that cab,” James said knowingly.  “You should call her, at least.  Lily can show you how to use a phone booth! She showed me last month, it’s fascinating—so many buttons!”

Sirius stretched out on the dusty couch he was sitting on, keeping his eyes peeled for anything out of the ordinary as he gazed out the window. 

“Maybe, once this is all over,” Sirius said nonchalantly, unsure exactly what “this” was.  He knew he shouldn’t bother getting involved with a Muggle girl—not now, at least.  It was too difficult and frankly, too dangerous.

“Think about it.  I know this whole situation is bloody awful,” James said, referring to the growing war, “but it doesn’t mean you can’t have at least something good along the way, y’know?  At least, that’s how I look at it.  If I didn’t have Lily—”

James shut up immediately, as Sirius had raised a closed fist in the space between them, military style.  Even though they were both well out of sight, they darted away from the window and behind a dusty old bed—someone was coming up the stairs.

Wordlessly, James rolled up the invisibility cloak and stuffed it into his robes; it would just get in the way if they had to fight.  He and Sirius both faced the door with their wands raised and pointed right at the handle.  They exchanged a look and nodded; even the musty air in the room seemed to hold its breath. 

The intruder rattled the handle frantically, then it clicked open as they magically unlocked it.  The door flew open and bounced off the wall with a loud thud, and a cloaked figure entered the room and promptly slammed the door shut behind them, breathing heavily.  James and Sirius glanced at each other in confusion; this was no Death Eater, and James’s eyes widened when the newcomer took off their hood. 

“Lily?” He spluttered, lowering his wand as Lily ran across the room and flung herself into James’s arms. “How did you—?”

“I shouldn’t have followed you, I know, but—there are four of them—downstairs—I’m sorry, I Stunned one, and I managed to get some parchment from him, it looks like a map—there’s four—” Lily was rambling and James and Sirius tried to understand what she was saying. 

“Slow down, Red,” Sirius said, and Lily took a deep breath. “What are we dealing with here?”

“Four Death Eaters.  I think it was a patrol, they weren’t doing much.  But I was following you and I had to pass them to get inside here.  James, I—I think they _recognized_ me.  And when they did, they followed.” 

“Anyone we know?” asked James solemnly. The Death Eaters Lily had seen must have just arrived, as there was no one in the entry of the inn when James and Sirius snuck in using the cloak.

Lily frowned, thinking. 

“We know _of_ them...Mulciber’s there, and that one Evan Rosier that was in the Prophet last week, I think.  I don’t know the other two.”  Lily then froze, holding a finger to her lips as she glanced between James and Sirius.  The three waited in tense silence as they heard at least three more people clomp up the stairs.  Their footsteps stopped just outside the door and this time, the door was blow right off its hinges as four hooded Death Eaters barged into the room.

“Stupefy!” Sirius shouted instinctively, and though he did hit one of the three men, the other two were just as quick in their counterattack.  Sirius ducked as a jet of green light whizzed past his left ear, leaving a gaping hole in the brick wall behind him. 

It was too small a space to fight in. 

“Impedimenta!” Lily fired the spell over her shoulder and subdued the Death Eater coming straight for her, then grabbed James and Sirius’s arms and Apparated, taking them both with her out onto the street about a block away from the inn.  Miraculously, they all landed on their feet, although Sirius hissed in pain as he realized he had blood flowing down his left arm where he’d Splinched just a little bit from the sudden action—there was a deep gash just above his elbow.

“Don’t mind it, they’re coming!” He told Lily, who was trying to conjure bandages to stop the bleeding. 

Sirius was right—the two Death Eaters they hadn’t subdued had revived the others, and all four came barging out of the front door to the inn, which was far too close for comfort.  

“Let’s go,” James said, putting himself between Lily and the approaching Dark wizards.  “Padfoot, let’s _go!”_  

But Sirius had started running towards the foe, brandishing his wand.  He managed to bring one Death Eater to the ground in a full body-bind, but the others were closing in.  With a panicked glance at each other, James and Lily ran after him, narrowly missing jets of red and purple light.  

Lily was soon locked in combat with Rosier, while James, too close to one of the unknown men to fire a spell, simply punched the Death Eater in the face as hard as he could, then kicked him to the ground.  The man’s hood fell off and with a sinking feeling, James recognized the tell-tale glassy look in his eyes—the man was under the Imperius Curse.  James Stunned him where he lay, making a mental note to tell Kingsley that this one, at least, wasn’t acting of his own accord.

The next second, there was a deafening boom that shook the ground and caused Sirius, James and Lily to stumble.  Lily had cast a Reductor curse towards a high stone wall running parallel to the road, and it began to crumble, sending tons of rubble and stone down onto the street. When the dust cleared, though, she was nowhere to be seen.  The two young men exchanged a look and nodded; Sirius leapt to his feet to hold off the remaining Death Eaters while James searched frantically for his wife.

“LILY!” James called out, coughing on the dust and dirt in the air.  His throat burned in protest but he kept yelling anyway until he was so hoarse he could barely breathe, let alone cry out anymore.

James looked over his shoulder to see Sirius taking down the last Death Eater, whom he recognized as Rowan Mulciber now that his hood had fallen off, while the others lay Stunned or otherwise out of action on the ground nearby.  He scrambled over the destroyed wall, still calling Lily’s name while Sirius cast a terrified glance his way after finally besting Mulciber and wiping a trickle of blood out of his eyes.  

“Where is she?” Sirius barked, his voice higher in pitch than usual.

“I-I don’t know,” said James weakly.  “Help me.”

Sirius cast a spell to bind the Death Eaters’ already immobile bodies with wiry rope just to be safe, then jumped into action and he and James set to moving rubble out of the way with their wands.  James was frantic, tears leaving streaks in the dirt covering his face, and he haphazardly flicked his wand back and forth, magically clearing away the rubble and praying the only body he would find under it all was one of the Death Eaters.

“Stop,” Sirius warned.  “Prongs, stop! You’re moving them too fast, you could crush her!”

He was right, no sooner would James charm debris out of the way than more would collapse from the force of the spell and fall in its place.  

“Lily!” He cried out again.

“Here!” He heard a weak voice answer, and his heart surged.  She was alive.  She sounded hurt, but that was fixable, James thought.  

“Keep talking, Lil,” Sirius called, groaning with the effort of moving a huge stone by hand.  The two young men followed Lily’s voice and finally found her half-trapped under the beam of a street lamp that had been destroyed as the wall fell.  It was slightly propped up where she was, but had she fallen just a foot to the right, she would have been crushed by the part of it that was now splintered on the ground.

James rushed to her side and she winced as she tried to pull her legs free.  “Lily,” he said, relieved beyond belief.  “Are you okay? Where’s Rosier?”

“M’okay,” she groaned.  “Stuck, though.  Rosier got crushed.  My wand…it’s somewhere in there and I–can’t–reach–it!” she said, punctuating every word with another attempt to get free.  

“Slow down, love,” James laughed weakly.  He was still shaking, but knowing Lily was alive made the whole situation far less intimidating and he couldn’t help but feel a surge of emotion at Lily’s resilience.  “We’re going to get you out; are you hurt anywhere?”

“Her leg,” Sirius said, nodding at Lily’s foot, which stuck out at an unnatural angle.  Her ankle was broken and as soon as Sirius pointed it out, Lily herself seemed to realize that she had in fact been injured; her face drained of color because of the pain the adrenaline had masked before.

James and Lily exchanged a meaningful look and both understood what they needed to do.  They’d have to lift the beam and pull Lily out at once, and it wouldn’t be pleasant.  

“Just do it,” Lily said, gritting her teeth.  Sirius nodded with a grimace and carefully levitated the beam.  Lily cried out, but grabbed her husband’s arm tightly so he could pull her backwards and out of harm’s way.  “Fuck,” she swore after the beam fell back into place with a thud.  She looked down at her shattered ankle and tried to move it gingerly.  “That is so inconvenient,” she said, out of breath.  

Sirius laughed at her casual observation as he conjured a splint to keep her leg still; he was rather gifted when it came to Healing procedures.  The trio winced at the cracking sound Lily’s ankle made as Sirius healed it with a complex little incantation, then he slipped the brace on.  He and James both helped Lily stand, careful not to jostle her too much.  

“I’ll send word to Kingsley, tell him to bring a couple Aurors and take these three in,” Sirius said, nodding towards the Death Eaters as he climbed over the debris again and disappeared on the other side.  James turned to Lily and cupped her face in his hands.

“What were you thinking, coming here?” he whispered, stroking her dirty cheek with his thumb.  Lily’s chest rose and fell with her quick breathing–it was all catching up to her now.  How Rosier had tackled her upon realizing she was too quick for his curses…her Reductor curse missing its mark and blowing up the wall, how scared she’d been because for a second, she thought the last thing she would ever see was a Death Eater.  At the same time, she and James crashed together in a frantic kiss.

His lips were firm on hers and their teeth hit each other a little in their desperation, but neither cared. Careful to keep her weight on just one leg, she wrapped one arm around James’s neck and rested the other over his heart.  She could feel it thumping; he still hadn’t fully calmed down and she hated that she had caused him even a moment of panic.  James deepened their kiss slightly and a moment later pulled away after one, two, three more soft kisses on her mouth.  

“Is he okay?” James suddenly asked; a horrible thought had occurred to him and he and Lily both put a hand on her belly.

Lily nodded.  “I’d know if something was wrong,” she assured him.  “It’s a he, is it?” She added.

James grinned sheepishly, realizing his little slip.  “I guess I’ve just got a feeling,” he said softly, and Lily’s face fell as she realized just what kind of danger she’d put not just herself, but her child in. Hell, she still didn’t even know if she actually _wanted_ the damn child, but her gut was telling her she didn’t want any harm to come to it.

“I’m sorry,” she said, her voice cracking.  “I shouldn’t’ve followed you, I—”

“I would have been shocked if you hadn’t,” James said fondly, and Lily smiled, then winced as another burst of pain shot up her leg.  “C’mon, let’s get out of here.”

As soon as Kingsley arrived with two other Aurors in tow, Lily handed him the parchment she’d managed to snag from Mulciber; it was covered in scrawled runes, no doubt some kind of code only Death Eaters could understand. 

“We’ve got a contact at Gringotts, a Codebreaker.  He’ll have a look at this; excellent work, Potter.”

“Thanks,” Lily said, “But this wasn’t my mission…I shouldn’t even be here.”

“And Dumbledore will be made aware of that as well,” said Kingsley.  “Nevertheless, this map could be a significant breakthrough if we can crack it.  Well done, all of you,” he added, nodding towards the restrained Death Eaters.

After Kingsley and the Aurors departed, James, Sirius and Lily decided to Apparate back to Sirius’s flat since it was closest, and there James, under Lily’s instruction, brewed a quick Pepper-Up Potion for all of them. 

“Dumbledore’s not going to be happy,” James said as they all sat around a toasty yet harmless fire that Sirius conjured on the coffee table. 

“Why not? We didn’t attack until we got attacked just like he said—stupid strategy, by the way—one more Death Eater’s dead, and we’ve just put three away,” Sirius said. “If he’s not happy, then I’m quitting the Order.” 

“Two,” James corrected; Lily and Sirius looked at him in confusion.  “Only two of the ones that lived were really Death Eaters.  The third was Imperiused, I could tell.”

Sirius straightened up in his chair. 

“A Death Eater’s a Death Eater, mate.  They were all trying to kill us.  You think if it had been the other way around and one of us were under that curse, they’d have cared?  No.  So we can’t either.” 

“I know,” said James, but he still felt uneasy knowing that going forward, they could potentially be hurting people who, given the choice, wouldn’t be fighting for Voldemort.  The chances were small, but they were there, and that bothered him. “It’s late,” he said after another moment.  “Lils?” 

Lily nodded and she and James both stood.  James took her mug for her and brought them both into Sirius’s kitchen.  When he came back a moment later, they said their goodbyes to Sirius, and Apparated back to their home in Godric’s Hollow.  Sirius let out a breath he felt like he’d been holding all day.  He was exhilarated, angry, scared, and upset.  As much as he thrived on the adrenaline high the day’s skirmish had provided, he hated the circumstances.  

He got up and brought his own mug of potion to the sink, then flicked his wand at the soap and sponge; they sprung to life and began scrubbing the various plates in the basin.  With a sigh, he leaned against the counter and checked on his cut from before; where before there had been an angry gash, now there was just a thin white line thanks to his healing skills, and he rolled his sleeve back down with a grimace.

Something on the countertop caught his eye: it was a small piece of paper and Sirius frowned.  He thought he’d thrown that away. He picked it up, smoothed it out, and glanced down at the wrinkled paper on which Devin had written her work address.  In the corner was the same doodle James always added to the notes he and Sirius would pass in class—a small Snitch, and next to it, two words.

“Call her!”

* * *

**And there you have chapter two!! PLEASE leave me a comment letting me know what you thought, or if you have any plot predictions at this point! Thank you all for your support and remember, you can find this fic and talk to me on tumblr too (@siriusblackfoot). CHAPTER THREE, TEA AND TENACITY is coming soon!**

**-Cait**

 


	3. Tea and Tenacity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Devin opens up about why she joined the CND. Sirius learns he is not a fan of hair dryers. Nor is he the only one with daddy issues. Can ice cream save humanity?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HI FRIENDS!! Here's chapter three; please leave a comment letting me know what you think and thank you so much for reading!! :D

**_Muggle London_ **

**_January 23, 1980_**  

The hands on the clock that hung over the welcome desk at Shear Style were shaped like a pair of scissors, and bent themselves into more and more impossible angles as the early shift drew to a close.  Devin was up to her elbows in shampoo suds, but couldn’t complain; Mrs. Roberts, a regular customer in her mid-sixties, was her last appointment of the day.  Devin was out at one, since today she was working a shorter shift. 

When she first started working mornings at the hair salon, she’d thought it would be relaxing—probably a slow stream of customers, if any, and there was free coffee in the waiting area. However, she’d underestimated just how many middle-aged women liked to get their hair done to start the day, and now that she was well into her shift, her hands were aching.  

“Alright, take a seat on the end and I’ll be right with you,” she told Mrs. Roberts. Devin lay a towel over the woman’s shoulders so her just-washed hair wouldn’t soak her blouse, then took her sweet time drying her hands before she headed over to start blow-drying.  When she walked over to her styling booth, Mrs. Roberts picked up their conversation right where she’d left off. 

“And I told him, I said, if he’s not moved out of the basement and into his own place by the end of this week, we’ll do it for him!” She was saying.  “And _what_ day is it?!” 

“Friday,” said Devin, shaking her head disapprovingly as Mrs. Roberts told her about her son for the third time.

“And where is he?” 

“Still sleeping in the basement? Unbelievable,” Devin said sympathetically. 

“Well, he won’t be tonight! Ray is moving all his things out onto the curb as we speak.  And honestly, I don’t think I’m being unreasonable. Thirty-four and still making your mother cook for you? I thought I raised him better than that.”

Devin looked at Mrs. Roberts in the mirror and nodded in agreement; she’d mastered the art of being a listening ear, and hearing her clients’ stories was her favorite part of the job. A healthy dose of middle-aged grumbling made any blowout more entertaining, and just added to the countless work stories Devin could tell her friends later. 

“I’m sure you raised him just fine, Lottie,” Devin assured.  “Some people just never learn!” 

Mrs. Roberts huffed her agreement and settled against the salon chair as Devin started combing through the tangles.   She’d just parted Mrs. Roberts’ hair the way she liked it when the bell over the door chimed loudly.  Devin was so used to the noise that neither she nor the other stylists looked up. 

“Good morning, have you got an appointment today?” Devin heard Lisa, the receptionist, ask. 

“No, thanks.  I’m actually here to see Devin, is she in?” 

Devin froze with one hand on the blow dryer; she knew that voice.  She laughed dryly to herself and continued her work.  So he’d gone two weeks without even dropping her a line, and now he was interested again?  Typical.  She rolled her eyes; if he really wanted to see her, he could walk through the clouds of hairspray and perfume himself. 

Sirius did exactly that.  He spotted Devin standing in her black work clothes and apron at the end of the row of chairs and he made his way over, carefully avoiding the trolleys of hair products until he reached her. 

“Hi,” he said simply. “So this is where you work?” 

Devin glanced over at Sirius for only a second, and tried to ignore the way her heart leapt in her chest; he was just as handsome as she remembered, and dressed in grungy, slightly mismatched clothes.  He had a look of fashionable disarray about him, and he wore it well. 

 _Get a grip_ , she thought, reminding herself that this was the same bloke she’d spent all of New Year’s Eve with, only for him to ignore her as soon as they went their separate ways.  Granted, she hadn’t made any effort to see him again either, but felt he was much more in the wrong.

“Hi yourself,” Devin said coolly, raising her eyebrows at Sirius.  “Long time, no see.”  

“Sorry about that,” Sirius said with a laugh, nervously rubbing the back of his neck.  “I’ve been busy.”  It was the understatement of the century, Sirius thought as he recalled the Order meetings, his and James’s mission gone awry, and the general scramble of trying to get one’s feet underneath them with the start of a new year. It almost felt wrong to be standing in a clean, Muggle hair salon when not long ago he’d battled Death Eaters and nearly lost a friend in the process. 

“Three weeks of radio silence and all you’ve got to say is you were busy, huh? Haven’t heard that one before,” Devin said sarcastically as she picked up the blow dryer.  Mrs. Roberts was watching the conversation unfold with wide eyes in the mirror and Devin smirked; it appeared she wasn’t the only one who liked to hear other people’s drama over a morning hairdo.  Deciding to humor Sirius, she made a show of taking a deep breath before asking, “How have you been?” 

“Alright, I—” But the rest of Sirius’s reply was lost as Devin turned the blow dryer on high and started working on Mrs. Robinson’s curls.  He jumped nearly a foot— _what the fuck was that thing?!_   He knew Muggles had all sorts of contraptions, but this was new and he tried to hide his alarm. He tried to speak over it, but Merlin, it was loud! 

As he watched the way Devin moved the machine over her customer’s hair, he realized it was slowly but surely drying it, and something she did with the brush made the woman in the chair’s hair fall into curls. He watched in wonder; it was times like these that he was both impressed by and felt bad for Muggles—what he could do with a simple Drying Spell, they needed a whole machine and both hands for. 

“Sorry, I didn’t catch that,” Devin said sweetly a moment later as she shut the dryer off to let a bit more of Mrs. Roberts’ hair down.  

“I said I’ve been alright,” Sirius said.  “I mean to stop by sooner, but my friends and I—” 

Again, the dryer roared and drowned out Sirius’s voice.  He sighed and gave Devin a look and mouthed “really?” to which she shook her head and mouthed back “I can’t hear you,” while still grinning at Sirius’s annoyed look. 

“Fine,” Sirius said loudly over the noise. “I can take a hint.  Sorry to bother you.” 

Apparently Devin could in fact hear him over the blow dryer, because she immediately shut it off as Sirius started walking away.  She watched him for a moment, tugging her bottom lip in her teeth. She was miffed he’d never called, but if he was truly as busy as he said… 

“Hey,” Devin said, and he turned around at the sound of his name and walked back over. Mrs. Roberts looked absolutely enthralled. “I’m off in twenty.”

Sirius nodded, feeling relieved. 

“I can wait outside,” he offered, wrinkling his nose a bit. Ever since becoming an Animagus, his sense of smell had increased tenfold, and the thick air in the salon was starting to get to him.  

“Sure,” Devin nodded, sticking a bobby pin between her teeth.  “I’m, uh…I’m glad you came by,” she admitted. 

“Just don’t bring that thing with you,” Sirius said with a wary glance at the hair dryer, which to him looked like a big noisy gun in her hand.  Devin smirked, then pointed the dryer right at Sirius’s face and pressed the on button. 

He flinched as the warm air blew his hair back, and tried to brush off the discomfort with a laugh.  

“Fuck off,” he said.  “I mean, thanks a lot,” he amended, noticing Mrs. Roberts’ look of shock at his foul language.  

“I’ll see you outside,” Devin said. 

“If I decide you’re worth waiting for,” Sirius retorted. 

“You’re one to talk about waiting.  I’ve been wondering if I’d see you again for ages now!”

“Had you that interested, did I?” Sirius said with a wink.  “Alright, alright!” He added quickly; Devin had raised the hair dryer threateningly and Sirius held up his hands in surrender. 

“Twenty minutes.  Don’t make me regret this,” Devin said, but the smile tugging at the corners of her mouth contradicted her warning. 

“Copy that,” Sirius said, then placed a hand on Mrs. Roberts’ shoulder and gave her a charming grin in the mirror.  “You look ravishing, love, by the way.”  With that, he left the salon, leaving Devin and her client ruffled in their own ways. 

“My,” Mrs. Roberts gushed, “Forget about me, dear, my hair will dry on its own.  Best not keep a man like that waiting!”  She watched Sirius leave with a youthful gleam in her eye that Devin hadn’t seen in all the times she’d come in to get her hair done. 

“He’s nobody,” Devin said, but she kept an eye on Sirius, watching through the salon window as he found a bench outside and sat down, rubbing his hands together in the cold air. “Besides, I can’t leave you half-curled! Ray would come shut this shop right down if he thought his wife was getting anything but the best treatment!” 

Mrs. Roberts hummed absentmindedly.

“Who’s Ray?” she joked, still watching Sirius. Both she and Devin burst into laughter as Devin got back to work, going as fast as she could.  Since when did twenty minutes feel like a god damn eternity? 

* * *

 “Let me see your hands,” said Sirius when Devin finally emerged from the salon. He wanted to make sure she hadn’t brought the blow dryer, and she rolled her eyes and laughed, taking her hands out of her pockets to prove there was nothing there. 

“Jesus, you’re like a cat near water with that thing,” she joked as she stood in front of the bench where Sirius was sitting. 

He shrugged and got to his feet. 

“I’m more of a dog person,” he said, laughing to himself at his little joke. 

“Well come on then,” Devin said, jerking her head to the left. 

“What?” 

“We’re going on a date, aren’t we?” she said, looking at him expectantly. “Or did you just stop by for your conscience’s sake?” 

“No, we can—yeah, a date,” Sirius said. “Sure thing.  Where to?” 

“It’s a surprise,” said Devin with a playful look as she started down the street. “Don’t wait all day, a girl’s got shit to do and by that I _don’t_ mean you!” 

“Bloody hell,” Sirius laughed under his breath, then jogged to catch up. He supposed he deserved the attitude after the way he’d just disappeared after New Year’s, and it was honestly keeping him on his toes. 

After about ten minutes of brisk walking and small talk, Sirius and Devin reached a quaint tearoom that reminded Sirius of Madame Puddifoot’s in Hogsmeade.  He didn’t take much of a liking to tea himself, but eager to get out of the cold and on Devin’s good side, he held the door for her with a wide smile and ushered her in. 

A stout man wearing an odd combination of corduroy pants, a button down shirt, and a linen apron came to take their orders; Sirius played it safe with some black tea while Devin went for an herbal type that held “notes of raspberry and hemp” according to the small menu. 

Devin shrugged off her coat and let her hair out of the knitted hat she was wearing; she looked quite pretty in the café lighting and her cheeks were still flushed from the cold. 

“I really am sorry I didn’t come by sooner,” Sirius said.  

“What keeps you so busy that you couldn’t?” Devin asked.  She had dropped the slightly accusatory tone from earlier and sounded genuinely curious.  “Are you working?” 

“You could call it that,” he replied.  _Working on defending the magical world, and yours too if this war gets any worse._  

“What do you do?” 

A less practiced liar might have stammered out some answer about being an accountant, or a cab driver, maybe, but Sirius was no amateur.  He was a Marauder, and had fibbed his way out of much trickier questions than this.

“My friend James and I—you met him briefly, I think—” 

“The one that kissed you, yeah?” 

“That’s him,” Sirius chuckled. 

“And you used to fuck your other friend.” 

“Yep.” 

“Is there anyone in your circle you _don’t_ get physical with?” Devin asked with an amused laugh. 

“It’s a burden, being this attractive,” Sirius joked, and Devin sat back in her chair and rolled her eyes, gesturing for Sirius to continue.  “Anyway, James and I, we’re in sales. It’s a small little company, nothing too exciting, just pays the bills.  Definitely not as interesting as a hair salon.” 

“That’s just a side gig,” Devin explained.  She paused to thank the waiter as he brought over their tea. “The CND’s my real job.” 

“Tell me more about that,” Sirius said.  He was genuinely curious about what exactly the group did, and since New Year’s, he’d noticed several flyers the couple times he’d strolled through Muggle London.  He figured they’d always been there, but he was just now aware of them.  Devin looked as though Christmas had come early. 

“What do you want to know?” 

“How’d you get involved?” 

Devin took a sip of tea and gathered an answer in her head she’d rehearsed countless times. 

“I’ve only been in about a year now; I heard about it last spring.  The CND’s been around for ages, but it died down until recently.  I saw an advert in the paper for it…‘NIX THE NUKES,’ I think it said.  Well, I agreed with that!  My uncle was in the RAF in the war and remembers exactly where he was when he heard the Americans had dropped the first bomb on Japan—he said he couldn’t move for five whole minutes when he saw the headlines, the pictures.  Did you know now we’ve got weapons like that here, in Britain?” 

“I didn’t,” said Sirius truthfully. 

“And so few people seem to care, if they even know.  These things are just sitting around, ready at a moment’s notice, and the government’s no doubt making more.  What’s more, other countries have got them too, so if a war breaks out…” she made a crude explosion noise, complete with hand gestures. “That scared me— _still_ scares me—so I went to a meeting of the local branch the day after I saw that ad, that’s where I met Etienne—” 

“The one _you_ used to fuck,” Sirius cut in with a smirk.  

“Oh, yeah, all the time.  But the operative phrase there is ‘used to.’ Those days are over,” she made a point to add.  “Anyway, I met him and the rest of the chapter here, and the rest is history.  Well, history in the making.” 

“So you protest?” 

“Mhm.  If it were up to me, every day I’d be blocking the roads where the missiles are transported, outing local government officials that support nuclear power…basically just causing a huge ruckus.”

Sirius couldn’t stop smiling.  

“You’re speaking my language, May,” he said as he gulped down some of his tea. 

“My parents aren’t too happy with me,” Devin continued.  “They think it’s a waste of time, and not a fight for a bunch of twenty-somethings to get involved in. We had a big row about it last week when I visited them.  My dad even tried to take me out for ice cream after, that’s what you know it’s bad.” 

Sirius looked puzzled.

“Whenever he gets really angry and overreacts, he’ll offer to get me a sundae after,” Devin explained.  “His way of apologizing, I guess, but it hasn’t worked since I was seven.  Dad thinks any problem can be solved with ice cream.” 

Sirius looked politely confused.  

“Can’t it?”

Devin huffed a laugh and glanced around the café with the air of someone surveying much more than just what was in front of her. 

"If you want to try and pour chocolate sauce all over the mess that is our society, be my guest. Talk about a ‘Bloody Sundae.’"

"Eh, couldn't hurt," Sirius shrugged. "We all scream for ice cream." 

Devin chucked, which grew into a real laugh until she had to cover her mouth for fear of spitting tea all over the table. 

"I’m sorry, I must sound like a real downer," she said as she wiped her mouth with a napkin, as if realizing the fact for herself just now. 

"Just a bit." Sirius held his thumb and index finger a centimeter apart for emphasis. "A little less end of the world talk and a little more first date banter, maybe." 

"I'm not always such a stick in the mud—honestly, I'm not!" Devin said; Sirius had looked playfully unconvinced.  "It's just that I know how lovely the world can be, so seeing it as anything other than that makes me sad...and it makes me want to change it. Set the record straight. You must think I'm completely off it," Devin finished with a knowing look in her eyes. 

"Quite the opposite." 

Sirius was becoming more and more interested by the second. Especially endearing, he thought, were her Muggle sayings. To him, the phrase was a _broomstick_ in the mud…close enough. 

“Ice cream _is_ a universal fix, though,” Sirius said.  He’d reckon a scoop of Peach Firecracker from Florean Fortescue’s could solve at least half of his woes. 

“Not when the problem is that you and your family have completely different set of fundamental beliefs,” Devin said, and Sirius nearly dropped his teacup into his lap.  He was shocked into silence for a moment; it was like she had taken words out of his mouth. 

“Now you’re really speaking my language,” he mumbled.  

“Not so fond of dear old mum and dad, eh?” 

“My folks nearly threw me out when I got Sort—when I said I didn’t plan on uni,” Sirius quickly corrected himself. “And they _did_ throw me out when I turned sixteen.  Apparently in my family, growing out of racism and prejudice is a sin.  The lot of ‘em are a real piece of work, let me tell you.” 

“Cheers to that,” Devin said sardonically, holding out her teacup.  “It’s just a shame that when we all get blown up in a nuclear holocaust, I won’t be able to look them in the eye and say I told them so.” 

Sirius made a _tsk_ noise.  “What’d I _just_ say?”

“Sorry, no apocalypse chatter, my mistake,” Devin rolled her eyes and Sirius nodded with a blithe smile. 

“I do have to break my own rule for a moment, though—if you think the ‘demise of humanity’ is that inevitable, your CND must not be fighting back hard enough.” 

“We’re trying!  We’ve got more people than ever before, but the real power is going to come from getting the public in on our cause.  That’s what the meetings are for; they’re open to everyone.” 

Sirius could practically see a light flick on above Devin’s head, almost as if someone had said _lumos._   She snapped her fingers and pointed at Sirius, her eyes wide and bright with inspiration. 

“You should come!” 

Sirius shrugged noncommittally; he’d suspected this was coming.  “I’d love to, but—” 

“Busy?” 

The idea of going was tempting, Sirius couldn’t deny it.  But his mind jumped immediately to James and the rest of the Order.  They needed him more than some Muggle group did, and he obviously cared much more about the Order’s cause.  As if that thought weren’t enough to remind him of the life he actually led, he shifted in his seat and felt the end of his wand poke him in the ribs from inside his jacket. 

“Yeah, really busy,” Sirius replied.  “I mean, maybe sometime, but I can’t promise anything.” _I’ve got my own meetings to go to._

“Well, listen, I’m not much for grand gestures, but our next big meeting is Valentine’s Day.  Romantic, I know.  Have you got any plans then?” 

Sirius scoffed; he hadn’t had Valentine’s Day plans since he tried to set James and Lily up on a date to the Three Broomsticks in third year, a plan that ended with Lily dousing them both in butterbeer and running back to the castle.  

“None that I’m aware of.” 

“Well, now you do!  Come on, just one meeting,” she urged, reaching one hand across the table to pat his.  “They’re only an hour long, and then we can all go get pissed and whine about love.” 

“Well, when you put it that way,” Sirius laughed. 

“So that’s a yes?” Devin asked hopefully.  Sirius paused a moment longer and then nodded; going to one meeting didn’t mean he had to go to more, and if something came up with Order in the interim, he’d cancel.  The Order would always come first, no matter how passionate Devin was, or how beautiful she looked when getting fired up about talking about the CND. 

“You had me at ‘get pissed,’” Sirius replied. 

“Excellent. Hey—bring Remus! Maybe Etienne can teach him a bit of French,” she said with a twinkle in her eye. 

“Remus would definitely like that,” Sirius agreed.  The pair spent another half hour or so getting to know one another until their tea went cold—Sirius learned that Devin lived on the outskirts of Sydenham with two of her friends from the CND, and that although their birthdays were both in November, she’d recently turned 21 whereas he’d just hit 20.  He made a mental note to tell James he was seeing an ‘older woman,’ something they always joked about since Lily was a couple months James’s senior. 

 _But you’re not seeing her_ , a voice piped up in Sirius’s head.  _And you shouldn’t._   He ignored it. Besides, there was nothing in the Statute of Secrecy that said he couldn’t go out with a Muggle girl—so long as he kept the fact that he was a wizard a secret, there was no harm done.  He’d dated Muggles before, too. Never seriously and never for very long, but he knew it was possible. 

“Then it’s a date,” Devin said as she stood and threw her coat back on. Sirius got to his feet as well and helped her free her long hair from where it had gotten stuck in her collar.  The static sent a bit of a shock from his finger to her cheek and they both jumped. 

“There’s a real spark between us,” Sirius joked, and Devin snorted at his lame pun. 

“I stand by what I said on New Year’s,” she laughed.  “You’re really fucking strange.” 

“Guilty as charged!” Sirius replied with a cheeky grin.  “Can I walk you home?” 

“I’m taking the tube,” Devin said, then shot Sirius a quizzical look.  “It’d be at least an hour walk…are you sure you’re from around here?” 

Sirius nodded, mentally kicking himself.  He was used to everything being a matter of seconds away thanks to Apparition, and would have to learn more about Muggle transportation if he were to see Devin more often. 

“Right, of course,” he said.  “Well, I’ll see you at the meeting, then?”

“Or you could see me sooner,” Devin said hopefully. “I do have a telephone at home, you know. It is 1980…unless you’d rather just interrupt Mrs. Roberts’ appointments every Monday.” 

_Right. Muggles. No owls._

“Erm, sure,” Sirius said uncertainly, and Devin wrote down her number. “I’ll call tomorrow.” 

“You’d better,” Devin said, then stood on her tiptoes and kissed Sirius on the cheek, just like New Years Eve.  As she left, she called back, “I’ll be waiting by the phone!”

* * *

**Please let me know what you think!! Will Sirius tell Devin he's a wizard? What happens next??? One way to find out -- keep an eye out for CHAPTER FOUR: CND, coming this weekend!**

**Cait :)**

 


	4. CND

**_Muggle London / Finsbury Park_ **

**_Valentine’s Day, 1980_ **

“Let me get this straight,” Remus said again as he and Sirius plodded through the gray February slush on the ground towards the nearest tube station.

“Nothing about you is ever straight,” Sirius joked, and Remus paused to slap him on the arse in response before he continued walking.

“You’re one to talk. Anyway, that’s beside the point. We’ve got a full-blown war on our hands, in which people are actually dying, people we went to _school_ with.  The Order’s weak as it is, and you’ve gone and joined a Muggle group that’s opposed to a weapon that’s not even actually being used?”

“Your confidence in me is astounding, Moony,” Sirius drawled. “I haven’t joined, and I don’t plan on it. I told her I would go to one meeting—I still hardly know what this damn org is about, so at least this way I can stop just nodding along.”

Remus pondered this as they stopped to wait for the next bus to Finsbury Park, which was near where Devin had said the meeting was. She and Sirius had seen each other a handful of times in the weeks between their tea date and Valentine’s Day—some days they’d go one dates, but once Sirius had thoroughly concealed all his magical possessions, Devin had started coming over.  

She never stayed the night, but Sirius liked having someone to share his bed with, if only for a couple of hours.  Despite this, Sirius was feeling rather nervous about going to the meeting. He was glad Remus had agreed (after some cajoling) to come along, so Sirius wouldn’t be the only wizard in the room. 

“Alright, so you’re not going to make some Muggle martyr of yourself.  That’s good. But it doesn’t change the fact that this is actually one of the most idiotic ideas you’ve ever had,” Remus declared.

“What, being a Muggle for a day?” 

“No, getting involved with one.” 

“Define involved.” 

“You know.”

“I really don’t,” Sirius said playfully; Remus was cute when he was flustered. “Enlighten me, Moony.”

“You’re…you’re throwing it in, aren’t you?” 

“Good Godric, are you still in second year?” Sirius laughed at the phrase. “Yeah, of course I am, she and I are two attractive, consenting adults who have many things in common, one of which happens to be that we’re incredible in bed. I’m being careful, don’t worry, _Mum_.”  

“You’d better be; we don’t need any half-blood babies crawling around Order meetings!” 

Sirius laughed and shook his head.  

“I just meant that I’ve always got my wand on me, but yeah, that too.” 

Remus mumbled something under his breath about where Sirius ‘always had his wand,’ then sighed.  

“It’s just risky.  Not that I have anything against Muggles, but generally when you and your best mates are fighting a war you don’t go spending all your free time with a bird you’ve just met.  There are more important things.” 

“You sound a bit jealous, love,” Sirius said.  He turned to face Remus and stepped closer, so they were only about a foot apart, and cupped Remus’s cheek in one hand.

“Not at all, _love_ ,” Remus replied, and it was true.  “I just don’t think it’s a good idea.” 

“Funny you should say that, and you haven’t even met her.” Sirius gave Remus a playful slap and turned to face the map of the tracks. 

“I have too!”

“Come off it, you were too busy fawning over her friend to even look anyone in the eye,” Sirius teased.  “Dev’s great, you’ll see.” 

“Dev? _Dev?!_ How in the name of Merlin’s saggy nutsack has she already got you giving her pet names?” Remus laughed out loud.

Sirius raised one eyebrow while simultaneously trying to figure out which train to catch to get them where they needed to go.  There were just so many different colored lines, it was maddening!  It didn’t help that being a dog when in his Animagus form meant Sirius’s color vision just wasn’t what it used to be. 

“Which one do we—?” he asked Remus helplessly.

“That one.” Remus pointed to a twisted line on the map and Sirius glanced at the clock—they were just in time.  “I’m not letting this go.  _Dev_.”

“Shut it,” Sirius laughed and once more stepped closer to Remus in playful confrontation.  “You know who else judges Muggles they’ve never met?”

“Don’t say it—”

“Death Eaters,” said Sirius matter-of-factly.  “Are you a Death Eater, Moony?” 

Remus rolled his eyes with a wry smile and pushed Sirius’s face away from his own.  

“You bloody well know I’m not.  And we’re going right back to fighting them once this meeting is over.” 

“Merlin’s beard, I’ve got it, alright? The Order comes first; _you_ , and James, and Lily, and all of our friends, come first.  I’m the last person you need to remind of that.”

* * *

“You made it!” 

Sirius heard Devin before he saw her, and had only a split second to prepare for her running leap of a hug. She threw her arms around his neck and the momentum made him stumble a bit as he hugged back.  

“In the flesh,” Sirius replied as they broke apart.  He gave Devin a quick kiss and then turned to Remus.  “I don’t think you two have officially met,” Sirius said. 

“As I recall you made yourself quite scarce at the bar,” Devin said cheerfully, and Remus laughed and extended his hand.  “Devin.” 

“Remus.  Nice place,” he commented, looking around, and Sirius got the feeling he was the only one who caught Remus’s sarcasm. 

As it turned out, the CND met in a large empty room on the bottom floor of an apartment building.  It was lit with several bare bulbs and half of one wall was wasn’t a wall at all, just a sheet of thick industrial plastic dividing it from the rest of the first floor.  According to Devin, the building was set for renovation, but until the construction actually got underway it was theirs to use as they pleased. 

“Thanks,” Devin replied. “And thanks for coming, by the way. We’ve got a few minutes before we start; come meet the rest of us!” 

Devin led Sirius and Remus towards a group of people on the far side of the room; they were busying themselves with setting up rows folding chairs in front of a collapsible card table and Devin quickly marched up and brought a few of her friends over. 

“Sirius, this is Talia and Gibs, Talia and Gibs, meet Sirius and Remus.” 

“Wotcher,” the one called Gibs greeted them. He was a young man with long, stringy blonde hair that stuck out from under a large newsboy cap. This in combination with his baggy clothing and freckles gave him the overall look of a scarecrow.  Eighteen and still waiting on a growth spurt, he was at least a head and half shorter than Sirius.  “Gibson Grant-Hughes, but don’t waste your breath saying all that. Gibs is fine! Dev, has Mr. E shown yet?” 

“Should be down any second,” Devin said, glancing up the staircase that led to the rest of the apartment building, where Sirius assumed the man in question must live.

“He’s our coordinator,” Talia explained to Remus and Sirius, “I’m secretary.  Talia Dorsey,” she said, and brushed her long braids off her shoulder as she shook hands with both newcomers.   Sirius noticed she had a stunning floral tattoo peeking out from underneath the neckline of her sweater, and the pale pink and green ink accents stood out against her dark skin.  “So you’re the one Devin’s always talking about,” she said, giving Sirius an appraising look-see.  

“Always, huh?” he teased Devin, who’s cheeks had turned pink.  

“I see new faces!” boomed a voice from the top of the staircase and Sirius turned with the others.  Descending the staircase was a man in his fifties, with an unkempt gray beard and ragtag, pilled clothing to match. His face was wrought with laugh lines and the skin around his eyes crinkled merrily as he jauntily came down the last few steps and landed with a bit of a bounce in his step.  “And who might you two be?  I see you’ve met some of my cohorts; how did you hear about us?” 

Devin smiled fondly, laying a hand on the older man’s shoulder.   “Boys, this is—” 

The man clapped loudly and Remus jumped. 

“Enoch Sturgess, at your service!  I answer to many names, but feel free to address me as—” 

“Mr. E,” Sirius said, “Devin’s told me all about you; she invited us here. Sirius Black,” he introduced himself, and Mr. E shook his hand with gusto. 

“Remus,” said Remus when prompted, though he wasn’t as keen to give out his full name. 

“Ah, of the Greek legend, brother of Romulus, founder of Rome? Of course, of course,” said Mr. E as he enthusiastically shook Remus’s hand, rather, his whole arm.  “It’s a pleasure. Shall we?” 

The group filed into the meeting room and took their seats; more members of the group had arrived in the last ten minutes and with now nearly forty-five people inside, the room felt quite hot.  Devin found some free seats towards the middle, and a moment later Etienne joined them and took the empty seat next to Remus, who was sitting one row in front of them and who suddenly looked much more excited to be there. 

“It’s nice to see you again,” said Etienne quietly as the meeting began.  Remus nodded and Sirius could practically hear Remus’s voice in his head saying ‘not a _fucking_ word.’ 

Mr. E sat at the table in the front of the room along with Talia, Gibs, and a blonde girl Devin hadn’t introduced.  After Mr. E’s opening remarks, the girl got up and handed a wicker basket to the first person in the first row, who put a couple of bills in it and passed it down. It started to make the rounds quickly, and Mr. E looked a bit chagrined at the lack of contribution. 

“I’ll assume this is because you’ve all spent too much on your sweethearts today,” Mr. E chuckled.  “I, for one, spent this lovely holiday with my carpet slippers and the Wonder Years, if anyone was curious.” 

There was a ripple of laughter in the crowd, and then Mr. E dove into various housekeeping details, which was Sirius’s cue to tune out. 

“That’s Claire,” Devin suddenly whispered, nodding towards the blonde who had her beady blue eyes fixed on the basket, “Our treasurer.  When we re-elect the board, I’m going for her position—she ‘lost’ a week’s worth of donations last month.  Speaking of which!” Devin leaned forward to take the basket from Etienne. She dropped a fiver in and handed it to Sirius, looking at him almost expectantly.  

“Right,” he said, digging in his pockets.  There were still a few coins there—change from his and Devin’s most recent date, a quick round of drinks back at the Handy Sip—and he pulled them out and tossed the lot on top of the small pile of bills. 

“Blimey, what’s that?” Devin whispered, reaching into the basket.  Sirius’s heart plummeted when he saw her reaching for a Galleon—it must have been in his pocket, mixed up with the Muggle coins! 

“Nothing,” he said quickly, snatching the large gold token before she could.  “A good luck charm, I got it traveling,” he made up on the spot.

“Can I have a look?” Devin asked as she passed the basket down the row.

 “That’d be bad luck,” Sirius fibbed, and quickly shoved the Galleon back into his jacket, his heart racing. “Only the person whose charm it is can hold it.”

“Okay, Jumpy,” Devin snickered and let the matter drop.  Sirius breathed a sigh of relief and tried to focus on what Mr. E was saying. 

“As I hope you’re all aware of by now, the next missile transport is scheduled for February the 28th,” he announced.  “I’m pleased to announced that a certain ‘John Doe’ in the police force who shares our sentiments has let me in on the approximate time of delivery, so there will be no need to dally by the roadside all day, although if you’re so inclined, dally away! Two missiles will be transported via route eleven east at approximately two o’clock on the morning of the 28th—officials think this timing will dissuade us from heckling them, but they are mistaken.”

“I’d like at least ten volunteers to join up with Cruise Watch that night; make sure the officials don’t get any missiles through easily,” Mr. E continued, and he beamed as he saw a response before he’d even fully finished his sentence.

Devin, Etienne, and nearly twenty other members of the group had volunteered, and Sirius had to admire their gumption.  He was especially proud that Devin was so willing to actually take action, and not just associate with those who did.  He could think of a few Order members who would do well to take a leaf out of Devin’s book, which, now that Sirius had thought it, was a rather sobering realization. 

“Hey,” Sirius leaned forward and whispered to Etienne. “What’s Cruise Watch?”

Etienne turned in his chair so he could address both Sirius and Remus at the same time. 

“Some of us like to, em, get in the way,” he said with a mischievous gleam in his eyes. “We try to stop the missiles getting where they need to go. You wondered about our ‘egregious protest,’” he said mischievously. “Le voilá.” He raised his eyebrows with a smirk and motioned towards all the raised hands in the room.

Sirius grinned and leaned back in his chair.  He loved magic, but the thought of all the good old-fashioned rabble-rousing it seemed like Devin and her friends got up to was enticing. He exchanged a look with Devin, who smiled back and lay her hand on Sirius’s thigh, squeezing gently. He put his hand atop hers, and for a moment he forgot all about the galleon in his pocket, and the wand at his side. 

* * *

 As the meeting ended, Devin made the rounds and gathered up her closest friends for a post-CND trip to the bar.  Sirius and Remus were waiting with Talia and Etienne when who should appear at Remus’s elbow but Mr. E, his hands full of flyers. 

“Can a man bother two new recruits to take a handful?” he asked, handing Sirius and Remus each their own stack of posters before they could answer.  “Slap them up anywhere.” 

“Sure,” said Sirius.  “Interesting meeting, by the way.” 

“Interesting enough to get you to come again? We can always use new members,” Mr. E said with an eager twinkle in his eye. 

“We’ll see,” Remus cut in before Sirius could say anything binding.  He didn’t like Mr. E calling them recruits one bit. 

“And your names, again?” Mr. E asked.  “Forgive me, my mind’s a bit full at the moment.”  Sirius and Remus re-introduced themselves and Mr. E tapped his temple.  “Now they’re in there,” he chuckled, then pointed at the flyers again.  “Remember—anywhere.” 

“Ready?” asked Devin. She’d returned with a few others. 

Sirius nodded.  “Remus and I told a few of our lot to meet us there, too.  The more the merrier, eh?” 

A murmur of assent rippled around the circle, and Devin slipped her hand into Sirius’s once they stepped outside into the cold night air.  The pub they’d decided on was just two blocks down the street, but Sirius lost track of how many couples they passed on the way—just in case one needed a reminder it was Valentine’s Day, he thought in amusement.  Behind him and Devin, Remus was walking with Talia and Gibs, trying his best to assimilate and act like he didn’t feel like a kelpie out of water walking through Muggle London. 

“How long have you two been members?” he asked them. 

“Four months,” said Gibs proudly. 

“Almost two years,” Talia answered.  “But I’ve been for the cause since before I even knew there were others who thought the same way I did. Eddie showed me the way, right mate?” she spoke over her shoulder to a lanky young man, who nodded and jogged to catch up with Talia.  

“Carrow,” he identified himself.  “Eddie Carrow.” 

“Carrow?!” Sirius and Remus yelped at the same time, Sirius having overheard the conversation.  They looked at each other, both thinking the same thing.  Amycus and Alecto Carrow were two of the most wanted Death Eaters known to the Order and the Ministry. 

“Yep,” said Eddie warily.  “That’s my name, don’t wear it out.” 

“We know a few Carrows,” Remus said, trying to mask his apprehension.  “Where’re you from?” 

“I was born in Jamaica, actually,” he said. “My whole family’s from Ewarton. Most are still there, it’s just me and mum who moved here last year.” 

Hearing that was a relief; the Carrows Sirius and Remus knew were from Northumberland and had famously lived there for centuries, but Sirius remained on edge and squeezed Devin’s hand subconsciously. 

“Who’s meeting us?” Devin asked him, and Sirius snapped out of his thoughts of Amycus and Alecto and what he’d do to them if they ever crossed paths.  As fate would have it, he didn’t need to answer; as he and the posse rounded the corner, he spotted James, Lily, Peter, Marlene McKinnon, and Benjy Fenwick, coming at the bar from the opposite direction. 

Peter was the only one of the five not coupled up, but he waved jovially as Sirius and Remus approached. 

“Alright, Pete?” Sirius grinned as he hugged Peter quickly, then James and Lily at the same time.  “Marls, Benjy, nice to see you two out and about!”

Eager to get out of the cold, Sirius decided introductions could be made on everyone’s own time once they were all seated with drinks in hand.  Under the scrutinizing eye of the head bartender, James, Sirius and Etienne moved three tables together so that everyone could sit together.  Sirius longed to levitate the heavy tables, but doing so in front of so many Muggles, even if he did it discreetly, would be enough to get him a Ministry hearing.  Disorganized though the wizarding government was thanks to the war, they still always managed to find time to prosecute wizards for even the smallest offenses, while the real tyrants in the community somehow continued to wreak havoc undetected. 

The night danced on in pleasant company; everyone seemed to be enjoying themselves almost uncomfortably well considering the two friend groups were only just mingling for the first time.  James was laughing out loud with Gibs and Talia, while Eddie and Peter were locked in a hearty debate about which football team had the best odds of winning the next World Cup.  Marlene and Benjy remained in their own little love-struck world, but had made sure to speak with everyone first. They’d been together nearly six months now, which Sirius felt was a tad long for the honeymoon phase, but happiness could be hard to come by these days, so no one was about to squash theirs. 

As for Remus, he had warmed to Devin and her friends over the course of the evening and was currently going shot for shot with Etienne—both of them complaining that they were painfully single. 

“It’s not even a real holiday,” Remus slurred, brandishing an empty shot glass at thin air.  “Valentine’s, my ass.” 

“Aucun doute là-dessus!” Etienne agreed, nodding.  The drunker he got, the more he spoke French, so when Etienne flagged down the bartender for another round, Remus had absolutely no qualms about it. 

Sirius chuckled as he watched them clink glasses and drink, and made a mental note to make sure Remus had someone to make sure he got home safely. 

“You know, I think I’m going to take a leaf out their book,” Devin said, cocking her head towards Etienne and Remus. “Want anything?” 

“All set, love, thanks,” Sirius replied, and after standing on her toes to give Sirius a quick peck, Devin squeezed past James and Gibs to order another beer. 

In her absence, Sirius turned to face Lily. She was leaning against the bar with a sort of strained smile on her face as she surveyed their whole group laughing, joking, and getting to know one another.  

“Sickle for your thoughts?” Sirius said softly, and Lily seemed to snap out of a daze.  “You look…troubled,” he said after a moment’s pause.

“I’m fine,” said Lily with what she hoped was a convincing smile.  “Really, I’m having fun! Fit as a phoenix…what are you doing?” 

Sirius was tilting his head back and forth, squinting at Lily with his face scrunched in concentration. 

“Just checking,” he said, then stood up on his toes to look down at Lily for a second.  “Yep. Looks like bullshit from every angle.  What’s up, Evans?  You’re not drinking, so either you’ve gone full Muggle and have to drive somewhere, or like I said, you’re troubled.” 

“You know me too well,” Lily admitted, then lowered her voice.  “It’s just—everyone’s getting on so well.  Wizards, witches, Muggles—we’ve got ‘em all represented here, all blood statuses, everything, and the world hasn’t stopped turning.  No one’s been hurt, no one’s less of a person for being here…it just makes this war that much worse, knowing it’s only because Voldemort’s a dickbag that we’re fighting it.” 

Sirius let out a barklike laugh.  “‘Voldemort’s a dickbag,’ Merlin, put that on my grave stone.” 

“Oh! Don’t say that!” Lily laughed, swatting Sirius in the chest. 

“Voldemort _is_ a dickbag.  The baggiest of dicks, and you can quote me on that.  And yeah, he’s gotten us into this mess, but it’s up to us to get everyone out of it.  Which we’re going to,” he said fiercely, looking Lily straight in the eye. He saw a flicker of some close relative of fear drift across her eyes. 

“He’s really out there.” 

“Yes, he is.” 

“And we’re the ones fighting him, while the Ministry’s gone and made a home for its head somewhere deep in its arse.”

“You’re turning phrases like flapjacks tonight,” Sirius commented. “But, also yes.”

Lily sighed and shook her head dolefully at Sirius, who smiled sympathetically back. 

“The world’s gone mental, hasn’t it?” She asked.   

They both knew there was only one possible answer.

* * *

**Please leave me a comment if you liked this!! CHAPTER 5: A GOOD OLD-FASHIONED MARAUDERS BIRTHDAY PARTY is coming soon!**

**Cait :)**

 


	5. A Good Old-Fashioned Marauders Birthday Party

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay! I've been obsessing over Bohemian Rhapsody lol but I'm back with chapter 5; please let me know what you think!

**_Sirius’s Flat_ **

**_February 29, 1980_ **

 

"For he's a jolly good fellow, for he's a jolly good fellow, for he's a jolly good fellooooooow," the Marauders and Lily sang in unison as James carefully levitated a giant birthday cake out from the kitchen.

 

"And he forgot to zip his fly," Sirius finished to the tune of the song amid laughter from all present.

 

Peter's cheeks were as pink as the frosted letters on his cake as he tried to hide just how excited he was.

 

"I told you lot you didn't have to make a fuss over me!" He said, clearly delighted that they'd ignored his wishes.

 

"Nonsense, Wormy, 'fuss' is our middle name!" James declared, wiping his brow once he'd successfully gotten the cake into the table.  He winked at the others; they'd been planning Peter's party for at least two weeks.  Normally they'd all just go to the Leaky Cauldron or the Three Broomsticks and make sure Peter didn't pay a single Knut, but this year was special.

 

Since it was a leap year, Peter could celebrate his birthday on the actual day! 

 

"Happy real birthday, mate," Sirius said as he clapped a hand on Peter's shoulder. "The big 2-0! You've officially beaten teen pregnancy!"

 

Lily and James both jumped a bit at what Sirius said—he'd unknowingly praised Peter for avoiding what they hadn't.  They'd done the math as soon as they found out Lily was pregnant--she'd been 19 at the time. 

 

"Not like it took him much effort to beat," Remus chuckled.

 

"Hey!" Lily shook thoughts of the baby from her mind and jumped to Peter's defense. She stood behind his chair and gave him a protective hug around his shoulders. "Don't bully the birthday boy." 

 

"It's all love.  Besides, technically he's only five years old!" Remus replied, raising his goblet weakly in a silent toast. 

 

Sirius was amazed Remus had come to Peter’s party at all; later that night would be the full moon, and usually Remus liked to lie low for a day or so beforehand.  He had insisted on coming to the party, though, with the promise that he’d Apparate the second he started to feel unlike himself. 

 

Sirius flopped down on his couch and kicked his feet up on the armrest.  He'd offered to hold Peter's birthday party in his apartment for two reasons—one, he could put his feet on whatever furniture he damn well pleased and two, he could decide when it was over.  He wanted Peter to have a great party, but Sirius had already decided that the second Remus felt off and made up some reason to leave, everyone else would be made to leave as well.  That way, the Marauders could all go with him to transform for once.

 

Lily carefully arranged the candles on Peter’s cake and handed James, finding himself without something to do, walked over Sirius and sat on his lap.

 

"Merlin, what have you been eating, Hagrid's rock cakes?" Sirius gasped, faking breathlessness as he tried to sit up with James still sitting on him. 

 

“I could go for one of those right now,” Lily said so genuinely that everyone stopped and gave her an odd look.  She’d said it more to herself, she thought, but it hadn’t gone unnoticed and she averted her eyes when she saw that everyone was looking at her. “The others should be arriving soon,” she said quickly as a cover, glancing at her watch. “Then the party really starts!”

 

“It hasn’t already?” Peter asked in wonder; he already felt more than grateful to his friends for what they’d done.

 

“Nope,” said James. He then started counting off the guests on his fingers. “Marlene, Benjy, Frank and Alice, Mary, Dorcas, and the Prewetts.”

 

“Mary’s coming?” Peter squeaked, turning pink again. He’d always had a bit of a crush on Mary Macdonald, and his heart leapt at the knowledge that she cared enough to celebrate his birthday.

 

“Of course!”

 

“Padfoot, what about Devin?” Peter asked. “Go on, invite her!” He urged.

 

Sirius had considered doing exactly that when he and James were coming up with a guest list, but had decided it was best not to invite her or her friends for this particular event.  If he did, they’d have to nix all the charms and magical tomfoolery, and they couldn’t have a Marauders party without that!

 

“Nah, somehow I don’t think she’d take too kindly to what we’ve got planned,” Sirius said with a knowing look towards Remus and James. Remus had managed to secure several Everlasting Firecrackers for later, and everything throughout the night would be charmed, enchanted, or bewitched to make Peter’s party as smoothly chaotic as possible.

 

“Well, I think she’d _like_ it,” Sirius amended, “But I’m not trying to get sent to Azkaban for breaking the Statute.”

 

The Statute of Secrecy was an extensive document put in place to protect the Wizarding community from being discovered by Muggles, because there was no predicting the mayhem that would ensue if that were to happen.  Under its bylaws, no witch or wizard could reveal their magical abilities to any Muggle by accident, intent, or coincidence, unless it was a quite literal matter of life or death. 

 

There were very few exceptions to the Statute; the only one really ever exercised was when a Muggle couple had a child who showed magical abilities—then, of course, the parents would be let in on the magical world on a need-to-know basis.  The punishment for of-age wizards who broke the statute for any unapproved reason were severe, especially during these times.

 

The Statute of Secrecy was, in James’s words, not to be fucked with, so Sirius had made the responsible (his least favorite word) decision not to invite Devin tonight.

 

“Fair enough,” Peter replied.

 

“This just means we can use all the magic we want!” said James. “A good old-fashioned Marauders birthday party, eh?”

 

Everyone nodded, and on cue, Sirius’s doorbell chimed three times. Lily looked at him inquisitively, and he nodded.  A few months back, Sirius had set up an enchanted perimeter about five meters past his door, and any time someone stepped within it, a bell inside would ring accordingly.

 

Three chimes meant the person at the door was welcome, while two long tones meant someone was outside who had no business being there. Most two-tone occurrences had been Muggles who just happened across his flat and got too close, or the occasional door-to-door saleswizard.  Sirius knew he only really needed to worry when he heard one long, drawn out peal of the bell: that meant someone was outside, trying to force their way past the protective enchantments.

 

That had only happened once, when Rowle, a well known Death Eater, had fled in the middle of a battle, only to try and ambush Sirius at his place later that night.

 

“Marls!” James shouted when Lily returned with Marlene and Benjy, who were both carrying small presents wrapped in bright paper, which they set on the table next to the cake. James leapt up from Sirius’s lap and the latter let out a small oof, but followed suit.

 

“Happy birthday, Pete!” Benjy said, shaking Peter’s hand jovially. Peter thanked him with a sort of awed look on his face; Benjy was one of the most accomplished members of the Order. He had more than a few Death Eater names under his belt, not to mention a different name of his own—he often snuck into Death Eater meetings under his Voldemort-praising alias, Bertram Nietzsche.

 

“Alright, Benjy?” Remus greeted him fondly.

 

“Never better. Ready for next week?” Benjy replied, looking eagerly between Remus and Marlene. Remus furrowed his brow, unsure what Benjy was talking about.

 

“Dumbledore just sent the owl this afternoon,” Marlene added. “You’re coming with us on the next mission; he thinks your skills will be a real help.”

 

“Oh, erm…must have missed it. Did you say next week?” asked Remus weakly; he looked around at James, Sirius, and Peter—they all understood that look.

 

“Hope that’s not a problem for ya!” Marlene chirped. “Should be easy, anyway—Benjy’s got his way in with the Death Eaters, and you and I are just going along disguised as new recruits. Simple infiltration, in and out and home before you know it. Alice!” She then gasped, noticing that Lily had let Alice and Frank Longbottom in.

 

With Marlene and Benjy distracted by the arrival of new guests, Remus quickly gathered the Marauders together.

 

“You heard that?” He said.

 

They all nodded.

 

“And you know what tonight is.”

 

Again, nods all around.  The full moon should have fallen on the first of March, but due to the leap year, it would rear its ugly head tonight as well. Despite feeling under the weather in anticipation of a four-night cycle instead of just three, Remus didn’t want to miss Peter’s party, even if he did have to leave early to get to a safe area.

 

He wasn’t, however, looking forward to the thought of posing as a Death Eater right after transforming. Spending a few nights not as himself was bearable, but followed by pretending to be someone else?  It was a recipe for madness.

 

The only way he could handle it was if he had his friends with him during the transformation; they somehow calmed him down when they joined him as Wormtail, Padfoot, and Prongs, and romping with them made his transformations not just bearable, but invigorating.

 

“I hate to ask on such short notice,” Remus said. “But tonight’s the first night—it’d be bloody helpful if you came with me.  I know it’s different now, but—“

 

“Piss off, of course we’ll come!” James cut in.   

 

“To be honest, Moony, we were already planning on it,” Sirius added, and Peter nodded.

 

“We hardly ever get to all transform together anymore; it’ll be fun!” Peter chimed in.

 

Remus felt a rush of appreciation towards his friends. Since leaving Hogwarts, it had become much harder for James, Sirius, and Peter to accompany Remus when he underwent his transformations since there was no Forbidden Forest so close at their disposal anymore.  Now, transforming required a trip to the countryside, and even with the ease of Apparition, it was rare that everyone’s adult schedules lined up. If one of the Marauders could go with Remus, they always did, but to have all four of them available was almost unheard of!

 

Sirius often found himself thinking how astounding it was that now, as of-age wizards, it was actually harder to become Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot, and Prongs than it had been at Hogwarts.  At school, they had had to jump through hoops, sneak out of the castle more nights than stay in it, and dodge rules to become Animagi so they could transform with Remus—but now, they faced the much more difficult obstacles of time and circumstance.

 

“Are you sure? Wormy, it’s your birthday, you don’t have to—” Remus began.

 

“Bollocks,” Peter replied. “Sounds like a ‘good old-fashioned Marauders birthday party’ if I’ve ever heard of one.”

 

Remus smiles weakly and Sirius laud a comforting hand on his back. “I don’t know what I did to deserve you lot,” Remus said.

 

“Oh, you don’t deserve us,” James said, feigning seriousness. “And we’ll be expecting repayment soon, with interest.”

 

Remus rolled his eyes and laughed. “Well, it means a lot. We’ve still got a few hours before I have to get out of here, though, so Pete, have at it,” he said, gesturing to the party.

 

The Marauders broke up their side chat to rejoin the rest of their friends. The Prewett twins, Dorcas, and Mary had all since arrived, and Sirius watched as James made his way across the room to Lily, clearly telling her of the latest developments.  Lily nodded and kissed James on the cheek. As much as the idea of her husband running amok in the middle of a war worried her, she knew why it was necessary and if anything could make Remus’s “time of the month” less painful, she was all for it.

 

“Hey stranger,” Marlene nudged Sirius and he pulled her into a one-armed hug. He hadn’t seen Marlene outside of Order meetings since they’d all gone out for Valentine’s Day with Devin and her friends.

 

“How’s your girl?” Marlene asked as though she could read Sirius’s mind, and she raised her eyebrows suggestively over the rim of her martini glass. “Still your girl?”

 

Sirius grinned and nodded. “Yeah, we get on pretty well,” he said nonchalantly.

 

Marlene smirked. “Is that what they call it these days?” She asked. “Lily said that James said that you said Devin’s here quite a lot, but I don’t see her!”

 

“And why’re you so interested, McKinnon?” Sirius said loftily. “Jealous?”

 

Marlene scoffed.

 

“As if. How does she feel about...you know,” she said, pulling out her wand and swishing it in the air so a streak of soft silver sparks flew out of it. “The magic.”

 

“I haven’t told her.”

 

“What?” Marlene gasped. “But you—she should know she’s with a wizard!”

 

“I want her to like me, not run for the hills!” Sirius laughed incredulously. “I can’t tell her that! Besides, the law—”

 

“Yes you can! There’s a subheading in the Statute that says if you’re in a committed relationship with a Muggle, you can tell them that you’re a wizard. That’s why my grandma knows my granddad’s a wizard—you can tell a partner after a certain amount of time!”

 

Sirius shook his head and smiled ruefully. “That’s different.  This is not that committed, believe me.”

 

“I see…so she’s just getting magical wizard dick without knowing, huh?  Seems unethical if you ask me.”

 

“Well, I _didn’t_ ask you, and if I’m not mistaken, you’ve just said I have a magic dick,” said Sirius thoughtfully. “So you’re sounding a little oh-for-two right now, love.”

 

Marlene pulled a face at Sirius and opened her mouth to spit out a comeback, but Sirius ended up getting the last word; at that very moment, on the other side of the room, one of Remus’s firecrackers had gone off, emitting green sparks and pink jets of light that bounced harmlessly off the walls multiple times before finally fizzling out with a high pitched _wheeeeeee!_ It was followed by a series of cheerful pops as Lily, James, and the Longbottoms pulled on birthday crackers that, when they burst, filled Sirius’s living room with confetti, sweets, streamers, and in one case, live butterflies.

 

“To Peter, on 20 wonderful years of life!” James shouted; he was standing on a chair holding his goblet of butterbeer up in a toast while Peter, who at this point was covered in party streamers and a couple lipstick marks, beamed below. “Wormy, may your next year be your best to date,” James continued.

 

“Hear, hear!” Sirius and the others echoed.

 

“Where’s Devin from, anyway?” Marlene continued their previous conversation. “Is it all Muggle, or...?”

 

“Sydenham,” Sirius answered. It was a small area of outer London that was made up of mostly Muggle families and tenants.

 

“Huh. That’s near where our mission is next week. The Death Eaters are holding a meeting at a shack in Crain’s Alley in Penge.”

 

Sirius raised his eyebrows in mild surprise.

 

“Well, say hello if you see her,” he joked, but he had an uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach as he the thought of Death Eaters so close to where Devin lived. It burrowed into his mind and wouldn’t come back out. Should anything besides a meeting happen, neither Devin nor any other Muggles nearby would know what hit them. They’d be no match for Death Eater curses even if they were armed.

 

“Worm-y, Worm-y, Worm-y!”

 

Sirius and Marlene looked up to see that James and Remus had set up what look like an entire barrel of butterbeer, and with Peter’s go-ahead, Lily had pointed her wand and turned him upside down in the air to do some kind of twisted keg stand.

 

The image reminded Sirius an awful lot of how Snape had looked when James did the same thing to him back at Hogwarts. He dared not point this parallel out to Lily, but allowed himself a little chuckle at the memory, which, no matter how many times he recalled it, remained as bloody hilarious to him as it had been on that day.

 

James went next, and Remus shook his head in amazement, saying a silent thank Merlin that butterbeer was non-alcoholic. As amusing as it would be to watch Prongs amble around drunkenly, occasionally losing footing or walking antlers-first into a tree, during transformations they all had to have their wits about them.

 

“Your turn, Padfoot!” Peter beckoned Sirius over with a grin so purely happy that Sirius couldn’t turn him down even if he wanted to.

 

“Alright, then!” Sirius agreed. “What’s the record?”

 

“Twenty seconds; Benjy’s our reigning champion,” said Dorcas. “I hit eighteen, Peter’s in third at fifteen, and James tapped out like a little bitch at nine seconds,” she finished, and, not offended in the slightest, James bowed deeply. 

 

“Challenge accepted,” Sirius decided.

 

“Hang on,” James said suddenly, holding out his arm to stop Sirius.  “Mate? Alright there?”

 

He was looking at Remus, who was staring blankly into space where he was crouched in place, holding the keg in place so tightly his knuckles looked white where he was clutching the wooden rim. 

 

“Oi.  Moony,” Sirius said, nudging Remus with his knee.  Remus was startled and looked up to see James, Sirius, and Peter all looking at him, their expressions all clearly showing the same combination of concern and excitement.  Remus blinked slowly and got to his feet.

 

“Yeah, fine! Too much cake, that’s all,” he said, laughing half-heartedly so as not to alarm Dorcas or Benjy.  “We should go,” he then added quietly so only the Marauders could hear.

 

“I’ll get everyone out,” Sirius nodded, then turned to face the party and said loudly, “Hey! Hey! Party’s over, I’m sorry, I’ve just remembered I have a defensive enchantment set to give anyone who doesn’t live here boils if you’re not out in the next five minutes…irreversible charm, I’m afraid, no way to stop it now…”

 

“Boils?” Fabian Prewett asked, wrinkling his nose. “What kind of boils?”

 

“Big ones,” Sirius replied, indicating a considerable size with his fingers.

 

“Where?” asked Gideon warily.

 

“Let’s just say where the sun doesn’t shine,” Sirius said darkly, and the twins’ eyes widened.  In two quick pops, they were gone, and the rest of the group followed suit after some hasty goodbyes, which Lily made sure to keep moving.

 

“I’ll be back by sunrise,” James told Lily once it was just her and the Marauders left in Sirius’s flat.  “Promise.”

 

“I know,” she said with a smile, then kissed James deeply.  “I’ll meet you at home.  You, stop, I’ll do it,” she told Sirius, who had started gathering dishes and was sending them magically floating towards the sink.  “Go,” she urged the boys warmly.  “Be safe, no biting.”

 

They all nodded and grinned; those were the same words she’d tell them every month at Hogwarts when they snuck out on full moon nights.  She was like their sentry, making sure no one saw them leave the common room or re-enter it bruised and battered the next morning.

 

“The Highlands, just west of Plumbston,” Remus said so they’d all know where to Apparate to.  “Come on, we’ve got to go _now_.”

 

“On three?” Peter said, and on that cue, the Marauders Apparated straight from Sirius’s living room and into a vast expanse of high grass and rolling hills basking in emergent moonlight.

* * *

“Holy fuck!” James shouted as he shivered in the cold highland air.  “Fuck this, I’m transforming with my clothes on.”

 

“Sound logic, there, Prongs,” Sirius laughed.  It was freezing, but James would only tear his clothes if he tried to go full stag while still wearing them. 

 

“S-s-sorry I don’t want to freeze my balls off, I’m rather f-fond of them!” James rebutted, his teeth chattering. 

 

Sirius shook his head in amusement.  He was already down to just his trousers and hearing James whine about the February chill would only make the cold worse.  He, Remus, Peter, and a grumbling James made quick work of stripping down and stuffing their clothing and wands in a crevice of a nearby rock formation.

 

The foursome stood waiting for the clouds to uncover the moon for at least five minutes when Remus spoke up.

 

“You guys can go ahead and change,” he said.  “You’ll be warmer, and I’ll just be a few more minutes after.”

 

“N-nope,” Peter said. “All together, like always.”

 

“We appreciate the loyalty, Wormy,” James said with a wry smile, “but you’ve got shit timing.”

 

As it turned out, however, the Marauders didn’t have to wait much longer.  An almost unbearably cold gust of wind blew across the hill and took the wispy clouds with it.  Remus’s joints began to pop painfully, and his snout lengthened while thick hair sprouted all over his body.  He knew that James, Sirius, and Peter had seen this process a hundred times, but it didn’t stop him from feeling a bit self conscious as his body twisted and contorted itself into the thing he hated most.  However, as his vision began to blur, he could see a familiar trio of animals standing where his best mates waiting were just seconds ago.

 

 _Looking as dashing as ever!_ Prongs’ voice sounded in Moony’s head.  Moony bared his teeth in a lycanthrope smile and tossed his head back, emitting one long howl that to anyone else might sound forlorn, but was actually one of absolute contentedness.

 

 _Ooh, I love it when you talk dirty like that,_ came Padfoot’s snarky drawl, followed by laughter from all four of the creatures present.

 

With one last glance at each other, Remus felt a surge of happiness flood his whole body, and then Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot, and Prongs took off into the night.

* * *

**HOPE YOU LIKED THIS CHAPTER!!! Please leave me a comment if you did; it really helps me stay motivated! And stay tuned for _CHAPTER 6: The Wrench in the Plan,_ coming soon!**

**-Cait**

 


	6. The Wrench in the Plan

**The Potters’ house**

**London proper, early the next morning**

James felt like he’d been hit by the Knight Bus when he landed clumsily back on the corner of Gimbel Avenue and Nox Lane.  It was the best feeling in the world, since he knew it came from last night’s adventures with Moony, Wormtail, and Padfoot.  It had been too long since he last transformed, and the previous night was so exhilarating that it honestly pained him to have to come home before the full moon was over. 

 

He held his wand at the ready, half hidden in the sleeve of his robes as he trudged through the early morning frost back to his and Lily’s home.  It felt only right that they move into his childhood home after they were married—James knew his mother and father wouldn’t want it rented out or sold, and it couldn’t be in a better location. Tucked away in a neighborhood just a quick broomstick ride away from Diagon Alley, it was central to the wizarding community in London without leaving James and Lily feeling strangled by the bustling city lifestyle.

 

James pulled the invisibility cloak tightly around his body, wincing as his sore muscles protested his every move, and raised his wand arm when he reached his and Lily’s front door.

 

“Alohomora,” he whispered, and the lock clicked but the door did not open.  Expecting this, James cleared his throat.  “James Fleamont Potter, 2-7-3-6-0.  Novissima autem inimical destrueter mors,” he said quickly.  Upon hearing identification and the password that he and Lily had decided on, the door creaked open and James entered as quietly as possible.

 

He hung up his cloak and robes and set his wand in the same place he always did—on a wrought-iron wand stand that Peter had given him for Christmas one year.  When he turned the corner into the living room, he felt every muscle in his body relax, and a wave of warmth spread through his whole body.

 

Lily had clearly tried to wait up for him, but she lay curled up on the sofa, her hair spread across the cushions and her wand held loosely in one hand.  She was snoring a bit, and each puff of air moved her the hair that had fallen over her face ever so slightly.  James had need seen a more beautiful sight in his entire life. 

 

He removed his shoes and tiptoed across the carpet, then gingerly lifted Lily’s feet, sat down next to her, and placed them back down across his lap.  Lily started to wake up with a soft “hmmph?” when James reached over and moved her hair off her face.

 

“Good morning, sweetheart,” James said quietly. 

 

“How’s Remus?” Lily yawned as she slowly maneuvered herself onto her back, her eyes still closed.  Her body ached from being in the same awkward position for half the night, but when she opened her eyes and saw the cuts and bruises all over her husband’s face, she knew his pain was probably much worse. 

 

Despite the injuries, though, James was smiling as if nothing was wrong, and he took one of her fuzzy sock-clad feet and began rubbing it.

 

“You must really love me,” Lily giggled, “I’ve been wearing these for two days.”

 

“I am honored to rub your disgusting feet,” James replied with a grin.  “And Remus is just fine; Pete’s going to go out with him tonight again, then Sirius can be with him for the last two.”

 

“You’re not going?”

 

James shook his head regretfully.  “I’ve got heaps of parchment work to get done before the next Order meeting,” he said.  “And hardly enough time to do it.”

 

Lily nodded, remembering as she became more alert that Dumbledore had asked James to make more detailed logs of everyone’s missions including exact times and places of every one of them. James wanted to _Avada Kedavra_ himself just thinking about how long that would take, but Order business was Order business, and no matter how dull, it had to be done.

 

“I’m glad you went, then,” said Lily as she sat up and wrapped her arms around James’s neck at a sideways angle. She kissed him on the cheek, a little too close to a bruise, and even that small bit of pressure made James hiss in pain. Lily gently pressed her forehead against his.  “Let’s get you fixed up.”

 

With overdramatized, sleepy effort, Lily got up from the couch and motioned for James to stay put while she went to the loo and returned with various bandages and vials of medicinal potions. 

 

“Sit back,” she told James when she got back to the living room, and he scooched deeper into the couch cushions.  Lily set her supplies on the coffee table and then, feeling a bit mischievous, straddled James.

 

“Well hello there,” he said cheerfully, “Is this how you’re always going to heal me? Because honestly, I think this is all I need,” he said as Lily carefully cupped his face in her hands, tilting it back and forth to assess the damage. 

 

Lily smirked and carefully thumbed James’s lip; it was split on one side.  James pretended to bite at her finger, causing them both to burst into laughter. 

 

“Here, this ought to do the trick for the small ones,” Lily said as she dabbed a bit of essence of murtlap onto her finger.  She carefully applied it to James’s various cuts and he sighed as the pain dissipated.  “Did you have fun last night?”

 

“Loads,” said James enthusiastically.  “It was bloody freezing, but we hadn’t all transformed together in nearly a year.”

 

“I meant the party,” said Lily.  “I hope Peter had a good time, it looked like he did!”

 

“He loved it,” James confirmed.  “Every second of it.  Mission accomplished!” He held up his hand and Lily high-fived him.

 

“Good,” She said.  “It was nice to see everyone happy for once, not having to think about—” she paused, “—everything that’s going on. And now, just one birthday left!” she finished with a wide smile; James would be turning 20 in just under a month.

 

James nodded as Lily finished putting a few bandages over the deeper cuts that she couldn’t make vanish with just a spell. 

 

“I expect nothing less than an all night bash, I want to arrive in a hippogriff-drawn carriage, and I want the Minister herself to pop out of my cake, stark naked,” James informed Lily.

 

“Good to know,” Lily laughed.  “Although you might have to settle for Sirius on that last one.”

 

James pursed his lips and made a thoughtful face for a moment, then shrugged and nodded.

 

“Deal.”

 

Lily shook her head with a smile and carefully took James’s face in her hands again.  He in turn wrapped his arms around her waist and she felt them, firm and warm on her hips as he slipped them under her nightshirt.  She softly pressed her lips against his and kissed him passionately; as much as the logical side of her knew that James had been far from harm’s way last night, there was a part of her that still worried, and always would.  He kissed back with equal fervor and ran his hands up her sides.  The heat of his hands on her bare skin made Lily sigh happily and she arched her back so that their chests were pressed together.  A moment later, James pulled back with a look of utter amazement on his face.

 

“What is it?” Lily asked.  James ran his fingers through her hair, slowly working them through any tangles, and then looked down between them.

 

“I can feel your bump,” he said, and as he said those words suddenly everything—the war, the battles, what was at stake—felt infinitely more real.  Lily leaned back, balancing on James’s knees, and pulled her shirt up to reveal her stomach.  “I can feel it,” James whispered again, laying his hand on her belly.

 

Lily looked back at him, although she didn’t know exactly what to say.  Before now, they could pretend it wasn’t happening.  She could still convince herself that her period was just off because of the stress of the war.  She knew she would start to show sooner or later, but now that her pregnancy was an actual, tangible thing between her and her husband, there was no way to sweep it under the rug any longer.

 

“Did you hear what Sirius said last night?” she asked James after a moment, and he nodded.   _You beat teen pregnancy!_

 

“He wasn’t thinking,” James said.

 

“To be fair, he doesn’t know,” Lily said, and glanced down at her stomach.  “No one does. Right?”

 

James nodded.  “I haven’t told anyone, Lils.  I would never do that unless we agreed on it.  Not even Sirius.”

 

“I think we should keep it that way.  Until we can’t, anyway.”

 

“I agree,” said James, nodding.  “Everyone’s worried enough as it is.”

 

Lily nodded and felt her heart constrict.  What the hell were they thinking, being so careless in the middle of a god damn war?  Bringing a child into a world that was hanging on by a thread seemed so obviously foolish, such a painfully young and naïve thing to do…

 

Lily sighed and swung her leg off James’s lap, coming to sit beside him on the sofa again.  He wrapped an arm around her shoulders and she nestled into his embrace with her head on his chest and her hand resting right over his heart.  The couple sat in silence for a moment, both thinking the same thing. They had had a short conversation when they first found out Lily was pregnant at the end of November, but honestly, they didn’t talk about it nearly as much as they should, and neither of them had addressed the hippogriff in the room: they were practically still kids themselves.  How on Merlin’s green earth were they supposed to raise one? Sure, they had the money, but it took a lot more than just that.

 

“What are we going to do, James?” Lily asked.  It wasn’t a question born from despair, more from genuine lack of knowing. 

 

James kissed Lily’s hair and wished he had an answer.  “What do you want to do? It’s your body.”

 

“Yeah, but it’s _our_ kid,” Lily said earnestly.  “Besides, I’m four months along. That’s pretty late to—you know, end it.  Even at St. Mungo’s.  Even if I wanted to,” Lily said quietly after a pause.

 

“You don’t want to,” James said; it wasn’t a question.  Lily shook her head no and bowed her head, pretending to look at her nails to hide the tears welling up in her eyes.  James’s heart was thumping wildly; they’d never gotten this far when they tried to talk about the baby before.  One of them always got too tired, or too nervous, or too angry to bring it up, and, worried he might say the wrong thing, James had just assumed that Lily wanted to keep it.  As daunting as that was, it filled his heart with joy at the same time.

 

“I’ve been thinking about it a lot,” Lily continued quietly, “And I know it’ll be difficult and scary and beyond exhausting, but I just can’t shake the feeling that this was meant to happen, y’know? And it’s like your mum always said…sometimes accidents can turn into the biggest blessings, right?”

 

James smiled and stifled a laugh.  “She said that about the time I spilled permanent ink all over the ugly old table in the kitchen, so we had to get a new one.  But yes, that’s the general idea.”

 

James could see the worry in Lily’s eyes and quickly turned serious once more.

 

“You really want to have a baby?” James asked Lily, who nodded.  She always knew someday she’d want a child; she just didn’t think that day would come so soon.

 

“Then we’re having a god damn baby,” James said confidently.  “We can do it, well, you’re the one who will actually do it, you know, literally, with your body—”

 

“Thanks for the reminder, hon,” said Lily with a wry smile, and James squeezed his arm around her shoulders. 

 

“—But I’ll be here every step of the way. I will do every bit of your pregnant bidding, I swear.  Your wish is my command.  And we’ll be great parents, I know we will, we learned from the best!  Honestly, how hard could it be?” He said in an attempt to make Lily laugh that almost worked.

 

“Hey—Lils, truly, listen,” he said. “If anyone I know could be an amazing mother at our age, it’s you. I mean that with every bit of me. I love you, and I trust you, and we’ve got this.”

 

Lily had tears in her eyes as she leaned in for another kiss.  When they broke apart, James reached for Lily’s hand and threaded their fingers together, then placed both their hands on her stomach, on that small but undeniable bump.

 

“I’m with you,” James whispered.  “No matter what, it’s you and me, and the little one when he comes along.”

 

Lily smiled.  “You keep saying _he_. What if it’s a girl?”

 

“Oh, then it was nice knowing you!” James joked, and acted as though he was about to get up off the couch and walk out the door.  Chuckling, Lily grabbed him by the hem of his shirt and pulled him back down.  She settled into his arms again as the sun rose outside the window and doused the living room in radiant golden light. 

 

“I love you,” Lily whispered. 

 

“I love you too,” James replied, and he felt like his heart might burst from just how true that statement was.  “Until the very end.”

* * *

**I hope y'all liked this chapter!! CHAPTER SEVEN: COME HELL OR DEATH EATERS is coming soon!**

**-Cait**

 


End file.
